Once a year, I make a life-changing decision.
Why is this decision so life-changing, you ask? Because with a fringe, comes great responsibility.
A fringe also comes with great irritation. As someone wise and famous probably once said: “that which you love will also cause you the most trouble.”
Still us fringe-lovers persevere.
This list of problems is for all of you out there that suffer through the pain in order to keep that glorious face-framing ‘do.
1. Your fringe gets oily, the rest of your hair does not.
It’s been two days since you last washed your hair. You notice your fringe is sticking to your forehead and looks like you have smeared a touch of Vaseline into it for good measure. You are faced with a dilemma: do you only wash your fringe and throw out your hair washing cycle? Or do you wash your whole head when most of it is perfect two day old hair?
No one can answer this for you. It is one of life’s greatest questions.
2. The wind is your enemy.
Or rain, or heat. Really any element that throws off the delicate balance between looking fabulous and looking like this:
3. You own more combs than a hairdresser.
You have three at home, two at work, and one travel comb just in case one of the above elements throws off your fringe style.
4. A haircut a week is normal.
What’s that? You only go to your hairdresser once every three months? You must not have a fringe, my friend.
Those with fringes know they could trim themselves, but also know that decision will leave them looking like they gave the scissors to a three-year-old.
5. You battle the straightening iron almost daily.
You think it’s going to be your best friend. Until you use it and all of a sudden every hair is sticking out at odd ends.
6. You get poked in the eye every 30 seconds.
Stray hairs will always find their way into your eyeball and poke right at it continually.
The only way to stop it is this:
7. No matter how many times you tell yourself that you’ll never go back for another one, you always do. Because you still want to look like this:
Zooey Deschanel: Single-handedly contributing to false fringe expectations since 500 days of Summer.
Really, most celebrities are contributing to unattainable fringe standards. Here are a few others that flaunt their glorious locks with ease:
There are many more, I’m sure of it. What are your fringe problems?