I am a mother. I am tired, broken and sore. I have lumps, bumps, marks and jiggly bits.
I am a mother. I am solely responsible for the lives of two little humans, every single day and night, week in and week out and will be for the rest of my life (and maybe future #number 3 baby).
I am a health professional. I work in an industry which is largely focused on the superficial. The how you look. Not how you feel. Not who you are.
I am a mother.
You too are a mother. You are also tired, exhausted, broken, sore, have lumps, bumps, marks and jiggly bits.
You too live in a world which judges you on how you look. Not how you feel. Not who you really are and what you have sacrificed…and continue to sacrifice.
You live in a society that pushes images at you every day of women who have given birth and just “bounced back” – great for them (truly, that is great, Kate Middleton you are amazing!). But this is such a small minority. For most of us, our bodies change, and change a lot.
It is scary, it is hard, it can be down right disgusting and upsetting but it is real and normal. Although I am a qualified health professional I am also a mother and my body has also not just ‘bounced back’. We are starting to see a shift in the media and online with more women sharing the often hidden and unspoken realities of child birth and the effect on your bodies.
So I have joined in the movement. Here is my #takebackpostpartum body blog. My real body after two children.
On the 17th of January, 2015 at 11.10pm I gave birth to my second son. I fought to conceive him. Put my body through assisted reproductive therapy. I was broken just (ha just!) carrying him to full term. Broken in ways I did not know my body could break . Photographs do not tell the full story. I could barely walk. I was induced early just to get my son out as every day he was in me was another day I had to fight to keeping carrying him. Before I had children I would run marathons for fun…yes for fun – just wake up, find an event and run…I could barely walk to the letter box and I could not pick up my 2 year old.
2 Days Postpartum
Have I showered or changed my pjs…cannot confirm. Normally a size A cup, I am giving Kate Upton a run for her money. What’s more these puppies are ON FIRE and I still don’t know how to bloody use them. Show me that breastfeeding video one last time and I will tear the television from the wall socket – it is not helping. Everything leaks. I mean EVERYTHING. I am a mess of body fluid. I am wearing not one but two enormous maternity pads, inside granny panties to try and contain the postpartum bleeding. Golf ball sized blood clots keep coming out. I have to keep these to be inspected and make sure it is not part of the placenta. Where has my dignity gone?