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The Bachelor Australia is teasing us and we shan’t be standing it for any longer.
We frankly deserve more.
Here’s what we know: Something went on between the bachelor, 30-year-old Nick ‘Honey Badger’ Cummins, and one of the bachelorettes, 23-year-old Cass Wood, prior to filming.
It’s difficult to decipher just how well they knew each other, given Cass’ propensity to start a sentence and then stop halfway through for no reason, and Nick’s habit of speaking a language that does not appear to be English.
But we DO know they both live in Manly and met at either their shared rugby club or the gym. They have a bunch of friends in common – and that’s pretty much all Cass is willing to tell the other bachelorettes – accompanied by a sly grin that in my personal opinion indicates ‘I’ve seen our shared boyfriend’s willy hehe.’.
Cass, please.
To the camera, she’s disclosed they actually went on a “coupla dates” where they got to know each other “pretty well” – a story which has been corroborated by Mr Badger.
Cass entered the mansion with very “strong feelings” for Nick which she said developed in the outside world.
But we have questions that needed answering two weeks ago: Were they dating? Did they… sex? Do they or do they not share two young children and a puppy named Rex? HUH?
We dedicated far more time than we should have to uncovering the greatest mystery of our time, and here’s what we discovered.
Blair said a thing.
If we think Nick is keeping Cass at arms length on The Bachelor, that might just be very clever editing.
In an interview with Elle this week, following her eviction, Blair said, “Every single time they went and had their little chats together at cocktail parties she was gone for a long time so they obviously have some sort of connection which none of the girls really have in the house…”
Goodness.
“I feel like there is a lot more there than what she is letting on.”
Cass has said MANY things.
Cass estimates that her and Mr Badger went on approximately three dates prior to the show.
“Nick actually asked me out to dinner,” she told OK! magazine in an interview.
“We went to his um… we went to a pizza place in Manly. We went there a few times. I love wine and pizza!”
Cass – do not try and deflect the fact you went to that pizza place Nick’s uncle owns that he took Romy to on the show with the unexceptional fact that you like wine and pizza. WE ARE TOO SMART PLS.
She also told OK! that they had kissed and that’s it. “We would open up to each other and share information that you’d tell someone you’re really close to,” which sounds exactly like the kind of thing you do after sex time but okay.
But there’s more.
Cass said they had a very nice time together, but then Mr Badger was busy travelling, as was she, and they just “tried to see each other whenever [they] could.”
Oh, and also, “Nothing ever ended [between us].”
We. See.
The infamous trip to the Gold Coast.
Just when we thought we’d worked out the whole ‘Cass and Nick probs a one-night-stand thing’, Nick’s brother Jacob turned up out of nowhere and casually remarked, “I met Cass about a year ago, she was up for the summer, um at the Gold Coast and we went surfing with nick and we had a few yarns, few beers.”
DID CASS GO ON A GODDAMN FAMILY HOLIDAY WITH THE BADGERS? DID SHE?
He added: “They have a history outside, so it’ll be interesting to see how it works for her.”
Yes. Yes it will.
The most important piece of evidence of all: Instagram.
Well, shit.
We went deep and AHEM.
Firstly, Cass follows Nick on Instagram but he does not follow her.
We thought this was telling, until we realised that Nick follows none of the bachelorettes and might have been contractually obliged to unfollow her.
Cat and Shannon are among the bachelorettes who follow Nick on Instagram, whereas Brittany and Brooke don’t.
Cool.
BUT THERE’S MORE.
The first photo of Nick’s that Cass Liked was on February 28, last year. After they met at the footy club, perhaps.
She then continued to like his pictures intermittently up until October last year.
That's a solid nine months of Insta flirting.
When we stalked Cass' profile, however, we were confronted with an interesting find.
According to our very detailed records, Nick has never Liked a picture of Cass'.
Well, that's bullshit.
Could it be because he's not too into the 'gram? He does follow less than 200 people. Or could it be that he never followed her in the first place?
As a side note, yes, Troy Delmege from Married at First Sight liked her photos at this time and honestly Troy pretty sure you were faked married to Ash at the time FFS.
Now - back to the sudden halt on Cass' Insta Liking in October 2017.
What happened?
Filming of The Bachelor did not begin until mid March of this year. That's a solid five months of ignoring each other on social media which seems like the kind of thing you do when you've slept with someone a few times and then it fizzled out and you're semi pissed off so you stalk them regularly but don't ever give them the courtesy of a Like.
Our conclusion.
Nick, in our belief, is the kind of person who watches all your Insta stories but never replies/comments. He's a lurker.
Cass did go to Fiji in October, and Nick did appear to be doing some work around Australia around the same time, BUT our records confirm they were both in Manly in December so DID THEY MEET UP OR NO?
We think no.
Because it sorta was finished. Did Cass send a text or two and Mr Badger didn't respond? Probably. Did he hit her up for a late night hang and she refused because she was after a date? Perhaps. Are we projecting our own experiences onto two total strangers? Most definitely.
Point is - this was more than a few dates. And no wonder Cass is so bloody invested.