My husband paid me a compliment this morning. He said, “Wow, you look hot!” And my immediate reaction was to feel suspicious.
What does he want?
I did an internal rolling of the eyes which from the outside looked more like a furrowed brow.
“What,” he said. “Can’t I tell you that you look good?”
“Whatever,” I said, as I cut my son’s toasted cheese sandwich and carried it over to him.
Look, we’ve been together for 18 years and married for 12 so the only time he usually compliments me is when he’s feeling frisky, which was highly likely this morning seeing as he had just returned home from night shift.
In my head my, “Whatever”, was code for, “Let’s talk about this later when it’s not morning and when all three of our children are not within ear-shot and when I have a moment to comprehend what your compliment might actually mean and when I’m not dealing with a toasted cheese sandwich.”
He later told me that my reaction left him thinking, “I hope she doesn’t think I only said that because I want to have sex but also I do hope we have sex later.”
This sent me straight back to internal eye-rolling and a visibly furrowed brow because…typical.
So we had our weird moment where I immediately attached an secret agenda to his compliment, while at the same time hoping I did look okay because I was headed into work, and then I left the house to take the kids to school and shortly after hopped on a bus to work.
Which is when this text message arrive…
We then started texting about the kids and the moment was gone, but not forgotten. Not bad for 18 years together and 12 years of marriage. Not bad at all.
Even though he is clearly exaggerating with words like “beautiful” and “stunning”, I am quite chuffed that my husband looks at me this way. I’m no longer a spring chicken and I am ageing rapidly but in my husband’s eyes I look good and that’s all that matters.
It’s doesn’t matter how we look, as long as we look good to someone. And that someone gets to be with us for the rest of our lives.
Next time he pays me a compliment I plan to say, “Thanks hon”, or something like that. No eye rolling, no furrowed brows, no doubt, no suspicion and no second-guessing.
Of course my acceptance of his comments about my appearance will also have a flip side, like when he arrives home and says, “You look tired”, or, “Rough day?” Comments like those can still annoy me, right, because obviously those are the days I’m looking decidedly NOT “beautiful” and NOT “stunning”.
The Mamamia team shared the last compliment they texted to their loved one. Article continues after this video.
The point I am trying to make is that sometimes I forget to feel grateful that I am loved and adored. Sometimes I forget that I am so lucky to have found my special someone. Sometimes I forget to feel thankful to be married with kids and living my dream.
Sometimes I’m too busy cutting toasted cheese sandwiches and trying to think of something to do with my unwashed hair to properly soak in the fact that I am – yep, I’m going to say it – blessed.
SHE SAID BLESSED!
Come on, its the end of the week. Give me my moment. I promise I won’t use a hash tag before it.
So, “Thanks hon. Thank you so much. Have a good day.”
And all the other things I should have said.