"I'm a mum, and I judge other mums. This is why."

I know I’m not supposed to admit to it, but I just did.

There are two sacred truths that anyone talking about parenting must say at some point in the conversation: “Of course, everyone should do what’s right for them,” and, “We’re all doing the best job we can.”

I’ve said those things myself, but they’re starting to make me feel uncomfortable. Because I don’t really believe either of them are true.

Let’s start with the obvious stuff. Kids get taken away from their parents because they’re being abused and neglected. Worse, kids die from abuse and neglect. These stories bring tears to my eyes every time I read them. I look at the photo of the little boy or girl, see their trusting eyes, and wish I could just hug them and tell them that I’ll look after them and that everything will be okay. I’m not the only one who feels that way, am I?

Parents don’t have the right to do what’s right for them, if their kids are going to suffer as a result. And not every parent is doing the best job they can. Some parents don’t deserve the title of parent. Some parents don’t deserve to have kids.

Those horrific kind of abuse and neglect cases are rare, fortunately. But there are still plenty of times I judge other parents around me.

I know. You're not supposed to say that once you're a mum. You're supposed to say, "I used to judge, but then I had kids of my own, and now..."

Well, I judge more than ever. I think it's because I get more emotional about kids now. I know how much kids desperately need their parents, and how much they love them, no matter how their parents treat them.

I see parents with their kids, and I can't help judging. Not over something like handing kids an iPad to keep them quiet, or treating them to lunch at a fast-food place. But I do get judgemental over other things.

I've been at a supermarket checkout, and heard a little girl ask her mum a question about babies, and heard the mum tell her that it was a stupid question and she should just shut up. Maybe the little girl had been really annoying her mother all day, but I hated to hear her spoken to like that.

I've been at an indoor playground, and seen a boy playing roughly, then seen his dad come up to him and hit him to teach him a lesson. Maybe the dad thought he was doing the right thing, but I don't think that kid was learning that violence is wrong.

I've been out shopping and seen a woman pushing a pram with a newborn baby, who was crying and crying. Maybe someone had told her that picking up her baby too much would spoil him, but I just wanted to tell her that he was so young and it was okay to hold him and soothe him.

Here's a video of kids talking about their mums. Post continues after video.

Most often, I judge myself. I feel like a bad parent every time I lose my patience with my kids and yell at them to just hurry up and get their shoes on. I judge myself over countless other things I do wrong.

If you're judging other parents to make yourself feel superior, then sure, it's a bad thing. But that's not why I'm doing it. I don't feel superior.

I can't help what motherhood has done to me. I can't help being more likely to cry over a child in a newspaper I'll never know, and I can't help worrying about a kid I see at a shopping centre. I can't help judging.

So go ahead. Judge me for it.

Want more? Try:

"Stop judging single parents. We're not to blame."

"While you might judge me, this parenting trick is my saviour."