"All the times I won at Mum Guilt Bingo."

The other night I was tagged in a parenting meme on Facebook. Usually when a friend tags me in one of these things, I have a quick laugh (or sometimes just a little snort) and then turn off all the notifications.

But this one… this one not only made me laugh out loud, but made me want to stand on the podium and collect my prize.

I had not only won Mum Guilt Bingo, I was ready to crown myself presiding champion.

Finally, a game I was good at.

Image via Facebook.

Featuring such parenting achievements as 'wine or sushi after conception', 'threw away their artwork' and 'screen time of any kind', I felt like I had finally achieved something worth celebrating. Usually, I go to bed (like a lot of mums) with the all too familiar pangs of guilt because I gave the kids steamed veggies instead of fresh, I hid for too long during hide and seek (because I was on Facebook) or I neglected to make them toxin free, vegan, paleo, unicorn safe glitter play dough I'd screenshot from Pinterest months ago.

This is a game for real life mums, not Facebook perfect mums (I'm convinced these mum's don't actually exist). Real life mums can play along and be filled with a sense of pride, a sense of achievement and most importantly understanding.

Read more: Five things mums should never feel guilty about.

Looking at the list, I was filled with inner pride. I'd achieved most of the items in several rows by lunchtime Monday. See - I'm a winner.

Here's the time I made slime for my kids. They played with it for approximately three minutes. It then took an hour of washing to get rid of. Image: Supplied

Being a mum is hard, and as mums we are hard on ourselves. It's time to celebrate our fails and have a laugh. At the end of the day, we all just do our best.


In the spirit of Mum Gulit Bingo, here are my most notable achievements from this week.

The time my son chowed down on half a glue-stick while I was on a work phone call and I wondered whether this would buy me some extra time before I had to make dinner.

The day my sons spent every waking moment fighting and screaming at each other that I walked out of the house and locked myself in the car. At the time, I figured they could fight it out gladiator style to the death if need be.

The night I let my kids eat baked beans from the tin because I was sick of explaining the necessities of heating certain foods.

Read more: Being the mum of a fussy eater is soul destroying.

The moment my youngest lost his marbles in Coles and threw a packet of doughnuts on the floor, spattering fellow shoppers with chocolate frosting. And I walked away.

The day I was so friggin' exhausted that I wiped the children down with a baby wipe and promised myself to shower them in the morning.

Part of the decor. Image: Supplied

The time they snuck off with a packet of rice crackers and thought they got away with murder. I only let them so I could stay in the kitchen and eat the chocolate they didn't know about. Suckers.

The afternoon I let them watch countless episodes of Paw Patrol because I was pregnant, working and surviving on two hours sleep. I'm fairly sure they are capable of writing plot lines now.

Come on mums, what's been your greatest Mum Guilt Bingo win this week?