I have had three affairs and do not regret any of them.
I was always attracted to the forbidden world of affairs and illicit love stories. My choice of books, movies and anything in between always seemed to have a love story with a twist. Any combination of an affair was of interest to me. If there was a third party, I'd lock in and be riveted from the get-go.
As the saying goes, 'you are what you think', and I was slowly inching towards this alternative lifestyle, one movie and book at a time. Each fantasy taking me closer to the reality.
Watch Sophie Monk talk to Mamamia about cheating. Post continues below.
My first brush with an affair started 10 years into my marriage when I was about to turn 40. I received attention from a sexy blonde surfer who worked at the local pool shop. I was hooked immediately.
When I got home after our initial meeting, I vomited at the thought that I may be attracted to someone outside of my marriage.
But at the same time, I was instantly open to whatever was about happen between us. I was besotted, and after a clumsy start, we pursued an affair that was more teenage crush vibes than romantic. But something had shifted. I could do this; all guilt and fear had gone.
Then I met a dad at the school gates. This was everything I had never experienced outside of my primary relationship. Romantic all-encompassing love, care and the most devoted generous lover anyone could ask for. It was clear he was jumping ship from a marriage that was finished and, in his mind, I was his next wife.
I knew that I was not able to leave my husband, and after two years of what was almost a simultaneous marriage, the dad and I broke up. He moved on to a new relationship. At the time this was heartbreaking, but also one of the most profound changes in my life spiritually. I learnt much about deep love, rejection and moving on from someone. It could be done, and gladly, we don't break or die. I could do this again...
I eventually found myself on [extra-marital dating site] Ashley Madison, realising organic affairs at the school gate/local shop were an exception and not the rule. I signed up with blind courage that it would be an adventure at best.