"Explosive diarrhoea and a midnight snub." 10 women share their biggest New Year's Eve fails.

Although most public holidays come with unrealistic expectations, none quite compare to the hype around New Year’s Eve.

The pressure to have something exciting lined up in order to start the year off with a bang sets ridiculously high standards for the evening.

Quite often our plans – if we scramble some together in time – spectacularly backfire, resulting in an anti-climactic and underwhelming start to the new year.

And while this may be awful and demoralising at the time, the crappier the New Year’s Eve the better story it is. But don’t just take our word for it.

We put a call out to Mamamia readers to ask what their crappiest New Year’s was like… and their answers make us want to stay in and play Scrabble this year.

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“A few years ago I didn’t plan the holiday break very well and we ended up spending New Year’s Eve at my parents-in-law’s house in a small country town in South Australia. We all sat in the living room and watched the Edinburgh Military Tattoo together, and after that my parents-in-law went to bed. So my husband and I were stuck in this house with two sleeping elderly people, two small children, no alcohol, no phone reception and no air-conditioning. We went to bed and lay there, getting bitten by mosquitoes. At midnight, we heard the distant sounds of cheering.”


“My best friend and I usually spend New Year’s Eve together each year, but one year I had a new boyfriend who I wanted to see on the big night as well. As the new BF and best friend didn’t get along, I decided to spend half the night with each person. I started the night with my best friend – we got dinner together and had a great time. My now ex-boyfriend had messaged my bestie to ask her if he could take over and have me for the rest of the evening (there were a few back and forth no-so-pleasant messages between them). Eventually, I left my best friend to romantically ring in the New Year with the new BF at a bar he was at (I know, bad best friend points). But when I got there he wanted to ‘mingle with other people’. I didn’t really understand, we both went to the bar to have a drink together but he wanted to meet and talk to randoms at the bar. On New Year’s. So I had quite a bit to drink and had a chat with other random people about nothing in particular, and eventually left as… why stay? I slept in my car that night (outside the bar) and ate weeks-old crackers that were laying around in my car to soak up the alcohol so I could drive home alone on New Year’s Day.”


“So it was NYE of course and I had drunk a bit (a lot) and I was at a house party. It was midnight and for some reason, I was the only one inside the house while everyone was watching the fireworks outside down by the water. I sprinted down to the water where everyone was making out with their significant others on a rocky ledge. I tried to get up onto the rocks where everyone was but lost my footing. I fell backwards onto various rocks below and lay there with cuts and blood until a lovely male friend carried me inside. My friends washed me up, put me to bed and went back to partying.”



“I was keen on a guy for about six months and we agreed to go to the same club on New Year’s. I knew he was semi-interested in me but was also interested in his neighbour who was also going to be there. Fast forward to 11:59 pm and he asked to kiss me at midnight and I was obviously super excited. At about 12:25 am my phone rang and it was my best friend. She was lost in Bondi (two hours from where I was), and everyone had left her. She had to borrow money from the staff at Boost Juice to call me. I was madly trying to help her write down directions to her hotel so she could get home safely when I turn around to see the guy I just kissed leaving hand in hand with his neighbour as my best friend is sobbing in my ear.”

Listen: Mamamia Out Loud discuss whether Christmas should’ve been cancelled. Post continues after podcast.


“My first New Year’s Eve with my partner was at The Winery. That was the memorable, special part, until I drank too much wine and thought it’d be a great idea if I had oysters for the first time… fast forward to 11 pm and my lovely boyfriend is holding my hair back at home while I puke! At 11.55 pm he got me out of bed to watch the midnight fireworks from our balcony before I headed back to the vomit bowl. He then cleaned the whole bathroom! That New Year’s Eve was not a keeper, but my boyfriend certainly is!”


“The crappiest place I have been in at midnight was a cinema. Cannot remember the actual movie but about 3/4 way through there was a power outage. They believed they would have it up and running soon so told us all to stay, which like sheep, we did! They got the power back and little did we realise it was so close to midnight… so we started the movie back as the fireworks outside boomed. Didn’t hear the rest of the movie because of the fireworks!”


“We were at a house party last year and we were a little loud so the neighbours decided to break into the backyard and switch off the power. It wasn’t until 12.10 am that we noticed a) what the heck happened to the power and b) that we all completely missed midnight.”


“On New Year’s Eve in 2017, I was working in a pub that was extremely quiet. I was alone at the upstairs bar — no co-workers or customers – and I was polishing the beer taps with a toothbrush. At one point I looked up at the clock and realised it was 12:05 am. That was a real lowlight.”


“My parents and sister were out for NYE and I stayed at home. My dogs were soooo scared of the fireworks that one of them had explosive diarrhoea so I spent my night cleaning it up and could hear the neighbours do the countdown.”


“I worked in hospitality while at uni so I had to work at a pub/nightclub/big NYE events every New Year’s Eve until a few years ago. It’s actually sort of fun until you’re mopping up other people’s spew just after midnight on January 1…

“Also one NYE shift my ex-boyfriend called me just before midnight to tell me he was sorry for cheating on me – something he denied previously – and that he wanted me to know how good it felt to say that because he was now dating the girl I knew he had cheated on me with…”

Have you had a crappy New Year’s Eve? Tell us in the comments below.

Feature Image: Getty.

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