Question: How do you talk to yourself?
Do you wake up in the morning and look in the mirror and blow yourself a smooch and say “I LOVE MYSELF!”
Do you stand there, wiggling in your jarmies saying, “I love my thighs! I love my flat tits! I love that I ate rice crackers and cooking chocolate for dinner! I love that I only slept for four hours because I went down a Pinterest cake decorating rabbit hole! I love my life because everyone I know enjoys spending time with me!”
I bet you didn’t. I bet your inner monologue was more like:
Yeah. I hear ya sister.
I'm the KING of negative self-talk — except I'm not, because I'm not the king of anything, I'm more like a useless fat cow whose also quite stupid and who no one likes... (see where this is going? It never stops).
Every woman I know has experienced the same negative self-talk. But then this week I came across an exercise Michelle Bridges tells all her clients to do:
"See if you can go for 24 hours without thinking one negative thought about yourself or saying one damaging thing."
WHAT?
A whole 24 hours? Whatchu talkin 'bout, Mishy?
Yep, just for a day, every time you think crap thoughts about yourself, stop. All the the negative off-the-cuff remarks? Stop. Stop standing in the way of yourself, and think something positive instead, even if it feels like you're a big fat fraud.
Bridges does it all the time, and she says the more you do it, the more you can train your brain into loving yourself sick. That means confidence and attitude and better moods and nicer to be around and getting more shit done because you're not weighed down by the crap in your head. The knock-on effects of a simple tweak? Immense.
A simple exercise, right? Try it. I DARE you to try it. Because we all did and it's damn near impossible.
I asked everyone on Book Club this week to have a crack. Here's how it went down:
It was a tidbit I read about in her latest book, Make It Happen. We chose it for Book Club this week because self-help books sell billions of copies every year as we search for the magic bullet of happiness/wealth/enlightenment/productivity.
And it was full of themes and tips that really divided us.
Part biography, part self-help, full kick-up-the-arse motivation, it's a new direction for brand Bridges.
You thought she was just about doing squats and eating veggies and hassling people to do ten more burpees? Think again. The Biggest Loser wasn't enough. Her 12WBT wasn't enough. Now she's on a mission for everyone to get their shit together. (Can't you tell by her tough business chick career cover?)
Make It Happen is not just about your weight. Maybe things aren't quite going the way you thought they would. Maybe you have a bit of a crap financial situation or your career has stalled or you're a jerk to your family and also you kicked a cat the other day when no one was looking. Maybe you want to travel more. Or find something that you like doing. Or just learn to cook.
It's interspersed with life advice, simple practical tools and plans, and calls to action.
But do we really want to hear about this kind of stuff from a celebrity personal trainer?
Yes, I say. I loved the shit out of this book. I thought it had good advice all delivered in her no-nonsense-cut-the-BS-and-just-freakin-do-it style. #cultbridges.
But, I got ROLLED for it. Because Jacqui Lunn, my Book Club mate, doesn't need no self-help. And Lucy Rivers, our guest, got damn angry about some of the content.
They were NOT happy about it. Which is funny, because Michelle Bridges says not to surround yourself with negative people. So I almost stopped the record.
But we didn't. Instead, listen to me try and defend this book to the two most cynical women I know.
Good times. High fives. Positive self talk. Woop!
The full episode is here. Make it happen. Listen on a walk. Listen as you tell yourself how much your LOVE yourself sick.
Here's Michelle Bridges Making It Happen with her family
Michelle Bridges & Commando Steve
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