Melissa spoke openly about her love of sex on MAFS. Then two men turned up to her work.

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Business woman and mum Melissa Sheppard was hoping to be matched with a 'loving divorced dad' on this season of Married At First Sight.

But as loyal MAFS viewers know, not only have her hopes of a successful relationship with Josh faded, Melissa has also been the subject of online abuse that has spilled over into her real life.

"Two men have been to my place of work to find me," Melissa tells Mamamia. 

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"One man asked my colleagues if the 'freak in the sheets' was in. When she said 'no' and then asked what he wanted, he just said, 'Well if she's after a good f**k, I can give it to her.' My colleague asked him to leave and I reported it.

"It shocked me because no one has ever said anything like that towards me before. I know they were going from what they saw on MAFS, but that's not who I am. I wanted sex with my husband, yes, but not with multiple random men. It was scary."

Melissa admits that while she said and did all the things the public have seen on this season of MAFS, some context is missing and some scenes have been aired in a different order to how they happened in real life.

She says that her confident approach to her sexuality is also only part of who she is. 

"The MAFS team knew who I was and what I wanted in a relationship, and also that I didn't want to be anyone but myself. Yes I am confident, and I am a huge advocate for women and men owning their sexuality. 

"But I am also many other things: I am a daughter, a mother, and a friend. And my relationship with Josh was so much more than what the audience sees."

She says there is a lot that goes on that the audience doesn't see that might help them understand her on-screen portrayal. 

"Multiple times each day while filming, someone would ask me if Josh and I had been intimate. I was always honest and open with my response and I realised when talking to the other women on the show - who were also being asked that same question - that perhaps I was a little too open and honest!

"The 'freak in the sheets' comment came about when a producer asked me if I was 'vanilla or a freak in the sheets' in the bedroom and I replied that I was a 'freak in the sheets'! I said it, but there was context there with that very particular question that the viewers at home are not privy to. 

"The same thing happened with the 'Thor's hammer' comment. I was asked a question which I answered. What was I supposed to say? 'No, I would prefer a micro penis?'"

"It was just for fun and that also came at the end of my speech where I had said many other lovely things which were not shown."

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Melissa says that she and Josh had a lovely honeymoon together and that their relationship started out strong.

"We spoke about many things; we cuddled and laughed a lot. We played chess, went canoeing and jet-skiing, and had fun. We had good sexual chemistry at first, but Josh was going through a lot with the end of his marriage and while we may have struggled with our communication, I certainly never intended to hurt or upset him.

"I think in reality if Josh and I met at the pub, we would probably only have one or two drinks before realising we weren't a match. But that's not how it happened and I wanted to work things out between us."

Melissa says the online hate she has received because of her honesty about sex has been tough to take, especially when she knows the public have only seen part of her life and personality. 

"I've been a called all sorts of things in the media and when reading the comments that I'm a 'predator' or a 'sex pest', it's hurtful and shocking because I only ever wanted to have some intimacy with my husband.

"Some of the body shaming comments are also hard to read when I am labelled 'disgusting' or a 'fat white whale'. 

"I know I am just a normal 42-year-old woman. I look like many of my friends and I am okay with who I am.

"The interesting thing about those comments were because they related to the time I wore a bikini on our honeymoon. I was given the string bikini for filming (my favourite one piece was wet because I had worn it jet-skiing earlier in the day) and even though it wasn't my choice to wear it, I thought that as Josh and I had only had sex that morning, and he had seen all of my lady bumps, I didn't need to hide or feel ashamed.

"And yet here I am being body shamed just because I am a confident and curvy size 12 to 14 woman."

After auditioning for and then pulling out of the 2022 season, Melissa says she was surprised to receive a phone call from producers asking her if she was keen to take part this year. 

"I wasn't thinking about the show at all when I got a call from producers this year asking if I was still single. They told me they had the perfect match for me. I thought, sure, what an opportunity. Why not?!"

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The hairdresser and mum-of-one says that after a couple of serious relationships with younger men after her divorce, she was looking to meet someone her own age who was after something more.

"I was married in my twenties and then divorced, but I still have a great relationship with my ex and his new wife and we co-parent our son together beautifully. I have also had great relationships and sex with a couple of guys more recently but they were young; they didn't have kids and didn't understand what my life was like. 

"With MAFS, I was actually looking for commitment. I wanted to meet a loving divorced dad who wanted to have sex but as part of a well connected and intimate relationship. 

"I wanted kisses, cuddles and more - not just sex! But I also believe it is okay to want to have sex and a healthy sex life with your partner."

While her experience has been "gut-wrenching" and "hard to watch", Melissa says she has learnt a lot and has made some solid connections with the other cast members.

"I realise now I was essentially playing a character that I didn't have a script for. 

"If I did it all again, perhaps I wouldn't be so vulnerable or open. In saying all that, I have made some great friends and many of the guys and girls have sent messages and reached out to me to say they are sorry for how I have been treated. They have been checking in with me most days.

"I just need people to know that I am human and I will recover from this.

"Going forward my focus is on my son, my family, my friends, and my future life as a sommelier. 

"This is what I'm passionate about and this is the real me. I also hope to help people see that talking about sex is not a taboo and while it makes some people uncomfortable, it is okay to own your sexuality - at any age, stage, or size."

Laura Jackel is Mamamia's Family Writer. For links to her articles and to see photos of her outfits and kids, follow her on Instagram and TikTok.

Feature Image: Supplied.