SHHHH… shut up. QUIET BACK THERE.
THERE’S A TEXTING SCANDAL. EXCUSE US THERE’S A TEXTING SCANDAL.
No. We feel like it's only been three weeks but we've been waiting for this our whole entire lives.
You see, he's an entrepreneur, so he's wasted literally zero time between having a fight with Cheryl, and messaging another man's wife. He is nothing if not exceptionally efficient.
At the dinner party, the couple barely spoke, mostly because they despise each other. Cheryl tried to address their mutual hatred, and Jonathan rolled his eyes before bonding with another woman over their love of Trump and pro-life stance.
Jonathan has now taken off his ring as though it's some enormous act of defiance even though a) he's not really married and b) his fake wife was a stranger a week ago.
Listen to The Recap: Mamamia's podcast to listen to after you've watched Married at First Sight.
He tells the camera that he's found comfort with a new friend, "... we ended up getting along really well, we've been texting... I feel like I have a better connection with her than Cheryl," before proudly showing the producer his texts.
Dude. You had one job. To be fake married for a relatively short amount of time, and not cheat on your fake wife. That's literally it.