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The Twins recap Married at First Sight: The phone call that confirms everything.

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It's the morning of the final dinner party and, yeah. All the wives have woken their husbands up before dawn to tell them about Samantha's gossip at the girls' night. 

"THEN WOT HAPPENED."

In case you forgot (lol no one forgot) Samantha told Melissa that she spoke to Bryce's best friend on the outside and he does indeed have a secret girlfriend and her name is bleep. 

When Alana tells Jason he is taken aback. 

He says he feels "lied to" by Bryce and if everyone could just have a moment of silence for Jason that would be appreciated.

Oh.

It's Belinda. And she's wearing her sister's jumpsuit. That her sister wore when she was 13. Because she's had sex with Patrick. And we fail to see how those two things are related but yes okay continue. 

Patrick warms to Belinda as a seven-year-old gymnast about to do her floor routine and thinks he might tell her he loves her. 

"She really likes cartwheels AND the splits."

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Cool. 

Meanwhile, Liam is complaining about how long it takes Georgia to get ready and Sir. 

Like... read a f**king book. Go for a walk. FFS. Stop being so needy??

It's at this point we learn that Melissa still hasn't confronted Bryce about last night's revelation. But it's time. 

"I think he deserves the chance to explain," she says and we... respectfully disagree.

She asks Bryce if he knows this bleep character and he says without a BEAT "she's a friend of a friend".

Melissa then continues with what Samantha told her and he's all like "yeah?? It's the Tinder girl I was with before here??" AND DUDE THAT'S NOT WHAT YOU SAID LITERALLY 12 SECONDS AGO. 

"Can't you understand?"

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"I'm the victim here??"

"So you're going to believe Sam of all people?" he asks and yes absolutely definitely?

That's when Bryce gets very upset and says he has "copped this all experiment" and he's "so sick of it" and Melissa can "sort [her] shit out" but he's going back to Canberra (to be with his secret girlfriend etc.).

After he calms down, he kindly explains to Melissa that either she goes to Canberra with him or their relationship is over forever. 

Melissa asks if he's been speaking to bleep since the experiment started and he reluctantly says no and Melissa we don't know how to put this. 

You need to go through the man's phone. 

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As a matter of urgency. 

Demand. The. Man's. Phone. Immediately.

Bryce starts uncontrollably crying, groaning that he "can't do this anymore" and so Melissa comforts the poor man who, in his defence, must really miss his other girlfriend. 

"Bryce, sweetie, I'm so sorry for your pain."

Melissa tells the camera she doesn't know whether to believe Samantha or her husband, who she is "intimate with," and YOU BELIEVE SAMANTHA CAN YOU HEAR US WE CANNOT YELL ANY LOUDER. 

In another part of Sydney, couples are beginning to arrive at the dinner party and Kerry only dressed one of her breasts tonight.

"Dammit we meant to dress your second breast before we left the house."

We wait for Bryce and Melissa to arrive, but then a waiter announces "dinner is saaarved".

And hold on a second.

They're. Not. Coming. 

They're not bloody coming.

And we want our f**king money back. 

As everyone sits down and has a drink Johnny says, "the vibe is on point!" and we hate it. This isn't why we're here??

Quickly, the conversation turns to Bryce, and Georgia suggests that maybe if they got Samantha on the phone she could clarify the rumour. 

Everyone madly agrees and so Georgia kindly asks a producer for a phone, please, for the sole purpose of gossip, and a producer throws eight at her excitedly. 

"Release the phones."

Beck calls Samantha who confirms what she said last night, and adds that Bryce has apparently been madly calling all his friends today, telling them to shut up. 

Every time Beck says "ohhhh noooo" she is smiling like a maniac. Which we appreciate. 

But this isn't about Beck. Or Samantha. 

It's about Jason. Who is having his heart broken. 

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This is the most emotional and talkative and expressive Jason ever been. He was not nearly this upset when his relationship with Alana nearly ended. He came here to find a Bryce and it's all falling apart before his eyes. 

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But HUSH NOW because the experts have emerged out of the ground and Mel is wearing a crown.

Because she is the Queen. Of starting sh*t. 

"Try and stop us from starting shit xxx."

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Obviously they've brought with them the Question Box, which they had set aside in case of emergency. That emergency, of course, is Bryce and Melissa not coming, and therefore the potential of a really f*cking boring dinner party. 

The questions are very specifically tailored to each couple with is slightly disturbing. 

First up, Kerry asks Johnny a bunch of questions, like if her relationship with her ex-husband bothers him, and he's all like "no, if it makes you happy" and no offence but Johnny's maturity and emotional intelligence does not belong at this dinner table.

Then it's Liam's turn.

He is asked what he likes the most and least about Georgia and we didn't realise we were at a Year Eight sleepover but okay. 

'Look me and the girls do sometimes bitch about you but overall you're fine.'

Next, Georgia asks Liam if he thinks his friends and family will accept her and he enthusiastically shouts "NO", before explaining they're not used to the "loud" and the "pink".

Dude no offence but if your family don't like a girl because she wears a lot of pink they need to go to therapy??

Liam explains to the table that EVERYONE hates Georgia when they first meet her, wouldn't you agree?? And... no. They... don't. 

Georgia is uncontrollably crying while Kerry explains to Liam that Georgia is actually a fine person but Liam is having none of it.

His friends and family will hate her for no reason. And that is a hurdle she will have to overcome.

Next, it's Patrick's turn, and he confesses that he has "tummy feels" for Belinda which makes us feel gross. He says he would like to jump Belinda at the dinner party which would incredibly inappropriate, and when he asks her if she loves him she does that thing where she yells for five minutes in a state of sheer panic. 

OH IT'S BECK. 

Jake asks if she thinks they'll be together in three months, which feels like a fair question to ask your wife, but that would be a firm "no". From Beck. 

"Why won't you just drop it"

"I am such a realist," she reasons, while Jake cries, because his wife just said she doesn't, personally, see herself in a relationship with him. 

He then goes for a simpler question and asks if she likes him (at all) and she responds with a look of disgust. Like he is a food. That she is allergic to. 

"You like me more than I like you," she says and OK in Beck's defence she's tried to leave Jake twice already and he won't... let her. 

It becomes increasingly clear that Beck has stayed for the gossip which is a decision we will always respect, but now she'd like to never see this man again.

UNTIL TOMORROW NIGHT. 

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For more gossip and lols, you can follow Clare and Jessie Stephens on InstagramFacebook and Twitter. 

In case you missed our previous recaps...

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 27: The 'evidence' that destroys Melissa.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 26: Bryce's secret girlfriend was just... confirmed.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 25: The couple who will never have any friends.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 24: We just learned what Bryce says behind his wife's back.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 23: 'Mate. That was disgusting.'

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 22: No one can stop yelling at Bryce.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 21: The most embarrassing decision we've ever seen.

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The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 20: The man who single-handedly "ruined" a marriage.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 19: Booka just learned how much her husband dislikes her.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 18: When you break up in front of your parents.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 17: The most tone-deaf groom in MAFS history.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 16: Bryce 100%, without a doubt, has a secret girlfriend.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 15: The wife who can't stop insulting her 'grotty' husband.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 14: When your wife ruins a stranger's wedding.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 13: The most embarrassing thing we've ever seen.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 12: "I hope everyone in Australia hates your guts."

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 11: We're kind of... into this cheating scandal.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 10: You can't just force people to have sex.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 9. When you're a d**k to your wife on national television.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 8: The beginning of a dirty cheatin' scandal.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 7: How was any of that... allowed.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 6: John Aiken just changed the rules.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 5: When you see your match and can't stop crying.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 4: A bride just realised she had a one night stand.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 3: Precisely no girl wants to be told she's 'not ugly'.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 2: Coco's husband would like to be brutally honest.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 1: You can't just comment on someone's... teeth.

Feature Image: Nine.