Madge – “Pompous, pretentious, humourless”?

…and that’s just for starters according to well-known British journalist and social commentator Julie Burchill.

She’s written a scathing piece in the Observer that slams Madonna for being a hypocrite (demanding privacy while relentlessly flogging her work and various products) and at best, a mediocre talent.

“Turning 50 as she does in a few months, the question is perhaps worth asking: what did we do to deserve this? It’s been a quarter of a century of cruel and unusual punishments – peaking in the sustained, sadistic, hate-filled frenzy that was Swept Away – so far. Surely we’re going to get some time off for good behaviour soon?”

I don’t agree with a lot that Burchill says in this piece – I think Madonna has earnt her place as an icon by being more talented than 80% of the artists who have released singles during her the past few decades. Being a popstar is about more than just singing. Clearly.

However. I do agree that Madonna can come across as humourless and rather sanctimonious about her choices, her religion and her “art”. I also get pissed when she talks about how her kids never watch TV but that’s just my issue because mine watch A LOT of it and Madonna makes me feel guilty.

After the jump, more from the article, including Burchill’s interesting claim that Madonna’s vagina is stalking her.

“I’ve said it before, but it bears repeating: despite the received wisdom of the poor little Star – a Very Private Person – desperately attempting to go through life minding their own business while being stalked mercilessly by press, paparazzi and sad fans who need to Get A Life, it very often seems to me that it is we, the public, who are actually stalked by the stars. And to the most extreme extent. I’ve never to my knowledge shown Madonna my vagina, for instance, but she’s certainly shown me – and countless others – hers, in that vile book SEX.”

“With the advent of the astonishingly gifted Amy Winehouse we suddenly realised what had been missing in our singers, especially the female ones, for the wasteland of the Madonna decades – a voice. We wouldn’t have applauded a dancer with two left feet or a comedian who made people cry – but in making Madge the best-selling female singer of the twentieth century, we did exactly this. The ‘reinvention’ thing should have been a clue – since when did a singer ever have to ‘reinvent’ themselves? Did Billie Holliday or Aretha Franklin – will Amy Winehouse? No.”