Last week, Mamamia‘s Entertainment Editor Laura Brodnik wrote, “Behind every sexy Instagram snap that ignites a fire within your loins is a broken soul who is screaming internally” – in honour of the person tirelessly and thanklessly being bossed around behind the lens.
But did you know that something even worse is happening to our children?
We talk about the Boyfriends of Instagram; all the partners out there taking the perfect shot for their other half to post (so they can just get on with eating their steak for God’s sake). But we never mention the children. The tiny humans who aren’t even allowed to have a glass of wine before they take a bajillion photos of their #influencer parent to post on Insta.
It’s a dangerous and concerning worldwide phenomenon of epic proportions – and every other melodramatic hyperbole phrase you can think of.
So I’m sure you would agree it’s about time we implored: won’t somebody think of the children?
Take for example, innocent North West, the offspring of the slightly less innocent Kim Kardashian. Mummy Kim posted this photo this week, and little North can clearly be seen to be responsible for its artistic calibre:
It’s not the first time this has happened. Kim has given North credit for many photos, but that’s not the point, is it? It doesn’t mean North wouldn’t rather be doing something else – normal kid-stuff like watching The Wiggles or driving a mini Bentley around her grass tennis court.
But, people, let’s be realistic. There was no way North was ever going to avoid being part of the family empire. Matriarch and mastermind Kris Jenner has ensured that her family is a money-making machine, and everyone has to earn their keep.
So, perhaps this is all fair enough.
The other thing to consider is that even though a lot of people won’t admit it, they regularly get their kids to take their social media photos. I know a lot of my friends do…and I do. That casual pic of some influencer lounging poolside on family vacay? Photo credit: the oldest child available who can handle a smartphone.
And again, I think that’s only fair; I mean how else do you expect Mummy to pay for the vacay in the first place?
Of course, there’s one major influencer who doesn’t employ her child for her own purposes: Beyoncé. I mean, we don’t see Blue Ivy being put to work, do we? No, we see this: a little girl allowed to be a (very very very extra) little girl.
For the record, I’m not an influencer, but I do need pics taken of me for work. As a sole parent of an only child, the job of photographer falls to my 11-year-old son. Most of the time, he loathes doing it.
My attitude? You want nice stuff? Help me make the moulah.
Admittedly,he does also know how to take a good shot. #proudmummy
A photo can’t do justice to this skirt. Crushed cream silk ruffles – no ironing, SO comfortable. If I were ever stupid enough to get married again, I’d wear this skirt. And simply bought at my local market from a @ladystartups called Polita that isn’t even on Insta. #workingmomlyfe #stretchyfabricismyfriend #mybosssaidilookedhottoday
So let’s spare a thought for, and give a shout out to, the kids of Insta influencers who are helping their parents bring home the bacon.
We thank you for your obsession with getting your hands on our phones – without that, getting you to take our pics would be a lot harder. #blessed
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