Miscarriage is devastating, even if you already have a child. It feels as though your body is failing you, as though the happiness you felt just days before was some sort of cruel trick. That pregnancy that thrilled you and your partner is now gone and to make it even harder, you’re advised to ‘let your body miscarriage naturally’, which basically means you have to carry around your dead fetus until it comes out of it’s own accord.
Kayla Boyd, 29, wife of National Rugby League (NRL) player Darius Boyd, 29, who is signed to the Brisbane Bronocs, has spoken out about the worst 12 months of her life, sharing for the first time that in 2016 she went from feeling the joy of her second pregnancy, to being told she was miscarrying, to attending the funeral of her beloved grandmother to falling pregnant just two weeks later.
She wrote on her blog Adored by Kayla Boyd:
“It’s crazy to think that if I didn’t miscarry back in April last year, that we would have had our second baby in December just gone. The miscarriage really affected me, my Nana passed away the week prior and I guess finding out that we were expecting was some positive news for our family. To then miscarry, it was just another sad loss that I had to deal with.”
Kayla told the Courier Mail at first the news she was pregnant was a silver lining during a difficult time, shortly after losing her grandmother. “It was nice, positive news. You get emotionally attached and you start picking out names,” she said. However after being told she was miscarrying Kayla says she was left feeling emotionally drained.
“We went to her funeral and at the same time I was miscarrying and I think that’s why it was so much harder emotionally.”
“I didn’t deal with it very well at the time. Instead of being upset, I’m the kind of person who has to keep myself busy and so that’s what I did.”
When they discovered they were pregnant again Kayla was terrified of miscarrying again so made the decision to have an abortion, just two days after discovering the pregnancy. She says a quick decision was needed so she didn't get attached.