Strangely irresistible male actor marries talented young actress. On an island.

He has an island. She has a dress.

Apparently, Johnny Depp will marry Amber Heard this week in a very sandy ceremony.

In case you have forgotten what these very famous actors look like, here is Amber Heard’s beautiful 28-year-old face and Johnny Depp’s strangely captivating 51-year-old face:

And here’s a question for you: What could be better than a beach wedding on your own island?

“Not much, man” is the accurate answer.

Johnny Depp and Amber Heard are preparing to stroll down a very sandy aisle on Johnny’s private island in the Bahamas.

Here they are again, being all in love and stuff.

Johnny Depp, whose moustache stars in the movie Mortdecai at the moment, will marry Amber on the island inexplicably called Little Hall’s Pony Cay, People has confirmed (And when People confirm, it’s basically the truth).

The private island, which Johnny has owned for more than a decade, has beaches named after his two children Lily-Rose and Jack, as well as his idols Hunter S. Thompson and Marlon Brando.

The wedding has also been confirmed by the New York Post’s Page Six, who report that the guest list will be small with just 50 in attendance.

And the bride? Well, Amber will be wearing Stella McCartney, of course.

You might also like: The one type of happily ever after that Hollywood hasn’t embraced…

The couple, who met back in 2011 on the set of their film The Rum Diary, have been engaged for a few weeks despite earlier rumours that they had split.

Before that, Johnny was with French actress Vanessa Paradis for 14 years. The couple split in 2012 but were never married.

We wish Johnny and Amber all the very best (and we can’t wait to see the photos).

Flick through to see some more pics of Johnny with Amber and his family (as well as a few of his former flames)…