Meet Baron John Sewel.
He’s a Lord, member of British parliament, PHD academic, husband, father, and straight up PaRtY Boi. Lord Sewel snorts coke, wears pink bras, parties with hookers, and has made our dodgy parliamentarians looks like positive angels in the whole process.
Home on the ranch, busy Bronwyn Bishop has been stealing coins from the purse to take her little chopper for a spin, and we’re not happy. “You think THAT’S bad?” our UK friends from across the pond sniggered. “Wait until you meet Lord Sewel.”
Little Lord Sewel is an official servant to the Queen, and King of the party too, it would seem. Earlier in the week an explosive video surfaced of our mate John snorting cocaine in a wild romp with a rather expensive prostitute. Highlights from the video include Johnny boy donning a hot pink bra, snorting off one of the prostitute’s breasts, outlining his government expenses, calling Asian women “whores”, and turning a photo of his wife upside down. Nice, mate, nice.
Proving that you can never judge a book by its cover, Lord Sewel’s vital stats tell a very different story to his recent rampage.
- He’s the head of the Privileges and Conduct Committee for the House of Lords (LOL, LOL, LOL).
- He has a PHD in Anthropology from Aberdeen University.
- …and was the senior Vice Principal and Dean of Social Sciences and Law.
- He served at the Scotland Minister for Tony Blair’s government, and even has a law named after him, the Sewel Motion.
- He’s married, with two children.
- He lives in a lovely little townhouse right near parliament. With flowerboxes. And fluffy purple pillows.
So anyway, the video came out, and rather than apologise in a flurry of “I surrender! I quit! I know pink isn’t my colour!”, Little Lord Sewel has instead chosen to not give a single f*ck. He’s resigned from his role, but is otherwise chillaxing until the dust settles (read: enquiry is over, and he is acquitted), and is generally unapologetic for his behaviour. Interestingly, John Sewel couldn’t actually be fired from his role as a Life Peer in the House of Lords, because ~politics~
Top Comments
Oh I love the British pollies! The most decadent thing the Aussie politicians can come up with is fudging their expenses! Never a decent sex scandal to be had! And even if they do, it's something boringly normal. Even that politician (can't think of the name) many years ago who had sex on his desk, (was in all the news at the time) turned out he did it with his WIFE! Total lack of imagination, not to mention respect for us public who were hoping it was with his secretary whilst he was wearing stockings and suspenders, or with his pet budgie or something really perverted! No we have to rely on the British for that kind of thing!
The only thing I am disappointed in this story, is that he is Labour, I mean really the Tories should be hanging their heads in shame, because this is the kind of thing that they perfected! Mind you Sewell is a Lord, so that probably makes it acceptable, because you really have to be a Lord to do this kind of thing!
Yeah but did he use taxpayer coin to fund his lifestyle?
Actually yes, he did.