Ivanka Trump and her fashion line are making the world very, very confused.

A lot of things confuse me.

Why are pugs are born so cute if we’re not supposed to breed them? Why is US politics not like the West Wing? Why can’t Apple just invent a phone that doesn’t need to be charged?

Today, it’s Ivanka Trump’s spokesperson.

In case you missed it, US retailer Nordstrom on Thursday said that it would stop selling Ivanka Trump items this season because of the brand’s performance. (Side note: Since when did Ivanka sew?)

The move came after many-a-shopper decided to boycott Ivanka’s clothing line following her father’s controversial White House policies. (The perils of having a dad that bans Muslim immigration, am I right? *Sigh*. Shoppers can be so dramatic.)

Mocking Melania Trump: Enough, says Monique Bowley. Post continues after audio. 

“We’ve said all along we make buying decisions based on performance,” a Nordstrom spokeswoman told Fortune in an emailed statement. “In this case, based on the brand’s performance, we’ve decided not to buy it for this season.”

Which is all well and good. But can someone call Ivanka and let her know? Her spokesperson is a bit… confused? Or am I the only confused one here? (I’m not, I was being self-deprecating and polite.)

“Nordstrom ordered both apparel and shoes for the spring, and followed through with the orders on the apparel,” a a spokesperson for the Ivanka Trump brand told Refinery29 on Friday.

“They canceled the shoe order, kept the apparel order and moved the apparel from online into stores. It’s there,” the statement concluded.


Which can be translated to: We makes shoes, we make clothes, pasta is nice, touch my toes.

Except, they actually did understand, further telling Refinery29, “This was absolutely not political — it was exclusively based on the performance of the brand."

So they're not stocking it, then?

Ugh. My brain no comprendo this era of alternative facts and convoluted statements burying the truth. Can someone just get Sean Spicer on the phone so he can tell us what's actually going on?