A reporter flew overseas for an "international blind date". It didn't go to plan.

It’s one thing to cringe your way through a blind dinner date, but it’s another thing altogether to cringe your way through an INTERNATIONAL blind date that spans FOUR BLOODY NIGHTS.

Just ask James Matthey, a reporter from News.com.au who recently jetted off to meet Vanessa*, a single lass from America.

Intrigued by the dating site MissTravel.com, which typically sets up keen female travellers with wealthy male counterparts, James reached out to Vanessa online. In his own words, the Bangkok holiday the pair planned was “a blind date on steroids”.

The itinerary: the strangers would both stay at the same hotel, but in separate rooms. The five days and four nights would be spent making excruciating small talk, and lulls in conversation would hopefully be filled by spectacular sights.

Spoiler alert: the sightseeing was not enough to distract James and Vanessa from their complete lack of connection.

While James insists Vanessa was "polite, kind and friendly", their conversations about "prescription drugs, Woody Woodpecker bedspreads, Lhasa Apsos and alternative Chinese medicine" were disastrous to say the very least.

In fact, the duo knew they were destined for four nights of awkward hell just two minutes into brekky on Day One.

"We both knew we were vastly different people. And we had three whole days together to confirm it. Oh joy," James wrote.

"We talked, we laughed (or at least she pretended to) and suffered through awkward silences. Coming up with conversation topics for three whole days with a complete stranger, especially one you have nothing in common with, was damn difficult. More than once we resorted to weather chat — the lowest form of human interaction."

Day Two was when James says he reached the terrible (yet, let's be honest, inevitable) “Oh God, what the hell have I done?” moment.

"It was strangely claustrophobic. There was nowhere to go. I wanted to run away and hide and read my book, but I couldn’t just leave, could I?"

The feeling was mutual. In fact, after another couple of days of unbelievably tense silences, Vanessa said "she wouldn’t be going on another MissTravel date again".

... Ouch.

All in all, James agrees he "would probably never do it again, either", but is glad he took part in the bizarre experience, which MissTravel paid for in full.

"It’s just that we were so very different in almost every conceivable way."

Did ya hear that, folks? International dates with a stranger = probably not the best idea ever had.

Who knew?