parents

"I'm raising my son to leave me."

It is Sunday morning and I am the first person awake.

I curl up on the couch with a good book under a blanket and read while the sun comes up through the windows.

The house is quiet for about an hour until I hear the stomps of five-year-old feet down the stairs. My son comes over to the couch, gives me a big hug and snuggles under the blanket with me.

“I will be your little boy forever,” he says to me.

I feel like a Hallmark card.

raising my son
“I will be your little boy forever,” he says to me. Image: iStock

The moment will quickly pass as he starts asking science-related questions that I cannot answer without some help from the internet, and I will have to think about responsible things, like breakfast and that we will need to get dressed at some point

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The idea of him being mine forever stays in back of my head all day, because the truth is that he will not be mine forever.

One day he will belong to himself and maybe even a spouse, and I have to accept that. I have to accept that I am raising my son to leave me one day.

Even though that thought hurts.

Watch: A group of mums have parodied Adele’s Hello. Post continues after video…

Video via Emily Mills

But it is better than the alternative: Researchers at Cambridge have pinpointed the top reason for family rifts and have determined it to be their son’s new wife.

Evidently, the journey from son to husband can cause family strife as the family (especially mothers) try to find a way to integrate the new person into the family. Strangely, rifts don’t occur nearly as often with daughters and their new husbands.

After reading this study, I thought about my relationship with my mother-in-law and how graciously she welcomed me to the family, and how she sometimes refers to me as being the one who polished her son into the man he is today.

I am not sure that I deserve all that praise, but I am incredibly thankful that I have such a wonderful MIL who has accepted me into the family. (Thanks, Mum-in-Law!)

I hope that I am just as gracious when the time comes.

This post originally appeared on Lauren’s blog and was republished here with full permission. For more of Lauren, you can find her on Twitter, Google and listen to her Podcast

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