5 things that forty-something women worry about, but really shouldn't.


Hitting the big 4-0 can bring with it a long list of worries – some big, some small. But if you can manage to deal with some of those concerns, it’ll be easier to enjoy what should be some of the best years of your life.

Here are five things that fortysomething women worry about, but really shouldn’t.

1. “I’m going to be invisible soon.”

Oh no, you’re not. It used to be that women disappeared from public view after the age of 40, but not anymore. A lot of today’s biggest movie stars – think Cameron Diaz, Nicole Kidman, Sandra Bullock and Melissa McCarthy – are 40-plus women. Same with the stars of some of the biggest TV dramas, including Mariska Hargitay on Law & Order: SVU and Julianna Margulies on The Good Wife.

As far as Australian TV goes, look at Sonia Kruger, Lisa Wilkinson and Rebecca Gibney, just for starters. Even reality shows are casting older women (who can forget Deanne on The Block?). Women over the age of 40 have never been more visible. As it should be.

2. “I’m screwing up my kids.”

You know that saying, “Behind every great kid is a mum who’s sure she’s screwing it up”? Well, it’s true. If you’re worried that you’re not a good enough parent, you probably are, because you care enough to worry.

The fact is, very few children grow up to be serial killers. Most of them grow up to be happy, productive members of society. The majority of parents are doing a pretty good job. Kids just naturally grow out of a lot of their problems, from bedwetting to an unhealthy obsession with One Direction. What seems like a nightmare at the time can turn into an amusing story to be told at a 21st birthday party.

3. “I’m starting to look old.”

You’re probably being too harsh on yourself… but if you genuinely feel that way, do something about it. Advances have been made in skincare, with the development of ingredients such as Lysedine.

As well, marine ingredients like algae, sea salt extracts and giant sea kelp can do great things for the complexion. The right product could give you the boost you need to face this fabulous decade with confidence. I use Transformulas Marine Miracle Crème, which has been developed specifically for, ahem, mid-life skin.


4. “If I haven’t written that novel by now – or started my own business, or run a marathon – it’s never going to happen.”

So not true. The forties are the prime of your life. You’ve got the experience as well as the passion to achieve your dreams, and your children are getting more independent every day, which means you’ll have more time for yourself.

Lots of women do fantastic things later in life. E.L. James didn’t start writing until her forties, and Fifty Shades Of Grey did pretty well for itself, didn’t it? Then there are other inspirational women like Diana Nyad, who, at 64, became the first person to swim from Cuba to Florida without a shark cage. See? Plenty of time left to do it all.

5. “What was that other worry again? Oh yes… I keep forgetting things and I think it might be Alzheimer’s.”

If you’re in your forties and concerned that you’re becoming forgetful, you almost definitely don’t have Alzheimer’s. People with Alzheimer’s often don’t even realise they’re having memory problems.

If you forget the word for something but remember it a few minutes later, it’s probably not Alzheimer’s. If you rely on a calendar to help you remember to do things, it’s probably not Alzheimer’s. Your problem is most likely that you’re just taking on too much – keeping on top of things for your kids, your partner and your parents, as well as yourself. Give yourself a break.

What is your biggest worry about getting older?

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