And this is what I’ve learned.
This post originally appeared on Mama Bean Parenting.
Nope, let me try that again…
It’s been four years since I’ve worn these jeans.
Much better. Let me explain:
The first of these statements implies that for the last four years, I have tirelessly tried to rid myself of my mummy curves. That for the last four years, I have run, spun and lunged my way through motherhood. That for the last four years, I have become best friends with kale and have dutifully kept track of my slowly-shrinking waistband.
But that simply isn’t true. Here’s what really happened:
I spent my pregnancy eating… at first, just potatoes (before puking them back up.) But then, All Food. I was a pregnant seeker of All Food. Carbohydrates? Mine. Protein? Mine. Fat in every form? All mine. And please, don’t even mention sugar…
Then I spent more than two years being awake.
All. The. Time.
There was no night, there was just being awake. There was no dreaming. There was just being awake. There was no REM. There was just being awake.
- Keep my eyes open during daylight hours.
- Speak without a stutter.
- Cook -- and eat -- hot food.
Ah, hot food. How I had missed you.
And since rediscovering the miracles of REM and hot food, I've been super busy with all of this mummy-ing. I just haven't really been running, or spinning, or lunging. A bit of "omm-ing" on my living room floor, with a toddler mimicking my down dog and pigeon pose, perhaps... but really, there has been zero attempts at ridding myself of that belly. And why should I, exactly? I'm a healthy weight, if a little stretched in places... so I decided to forget about any "extra" weight and focus on just being.
But this "extra" weight wouldn't leave my mind. Not, however, in the way you might expect...
In the same way that I feel forever indebted to my belly for the life it sustained, I feel thankful to the "extra" weight, too:
I needed that "extra" weight on my ass to stop me from toppling forward from the weight of my pregnant belly. Balance comes in many a fine form.