“[I] have been increasingly disturbed since a friend told me about a week ago that she and her husband are having sex in the room with their 10 year old and 8 year old asleep,” the anonymous user posted.
Anon questioned that why, when they have a separate living rooms, the couple would choose to have sex in the space they shared with their kids. “My friend says it’s fine,” they posted. “They make sure the children are asleep but I am not certain that you can be sure or that they won’t wake up and lie there wondering what is happening.”
The friend of anon explained that it is no different to countries where entire families share one room. But Anon remained uncomfortable, particularly when it comes to the age of the child, stating she would not be willing to be intimate with a baby in the room.
“Part of me feels I should say something but I am a pretty chilled out person and never really get involved in judging what other people do so the other part of me thinks that it is none of my business, and maybe something that is okay for some people,” Anon explained.
“Is it normal in the circumstances (that they are having to share a room) and what should I say, if anything??”
Responses poured in, and continue to do so, with varying levels of support and condemnation.
“Would think the 10 yr old, knows they have sex anyway. Most primary schools start education around that age,” responded one user. “As long as they are being quiet, I don’t really see the problem.”
The Mamamia team confess- How much sex I’m having (post continues after video):
But this reaction was positively mild compared to some others, who went as far as to call it “child abuse”.
“I think its totally wrong,” commented Kim. “It’s bordering on child abuse and social services would not be pleased.” The commenter then went on to suggest that the parents could face legal ramifications for having sex in front of their child. “What if they wake up? Revolting and I wouldn’t be able to not say anything. There’s absolutely no need to do it in the same room so the fact they do is just disgusting.”
Other commenters shared personal experiences explaining why they believed have sex with a child of eight or 10 in the room was potentially damaging.
“I woke up when I was a kid and we were on holidays to my parents in adjoining rooms having sex and it really freaked me out. It’s just not something a kid should see,” said Yasmin.
But the debate was by no means one sided. Many other parents said that they had had sex with their children in the room before, and as long as the kids were asleep, they saw no problem.
“Well…. I’ve kinda done it too. not in the house tho coz my rooms a kid free zone but when we go to the caravan. we make sure they’re asleep, stay under the covers, make very very little noise, light out and if they wake up (4 year old did once) we stay perfectly still and pray to god they go back to sleep on their own,” wrote Maggie.
The question certainly divided Netmum’s discussion boards provoking over 170 responses.
What do you think? Is it okay to have sex with your child in the room? Is there an age limit? Have you done it yourself?