Sure, there are women in bikinis and heels (the most impractical combination in the history of fashion), and an unhealthy focus on aesthetics, but once you push past the first episode you realise Love Island is relatively inoffensive.
For every numbskull who confuses the word “monogamist” with “misogynist” – hello, Jaxon – there’s someone to correct their mistake. For every display of boobs and bum there’s an up-close, steady shot of sweaty abs and biceps.
The beautiful, tanned people are all objectified equally. It’s perfection.
So I was flummoxed watching Tuesday night’s episode, when two male contestants found themselves in a conversation about the supposed importance of ‘carrying on the family name’.
Grant, who is in a committed relationship with Tayla (they’ve told each other they love each other, had all the sex, etc), explained to single dude Teddy (unloved, a villa virgin, etc) that his future wife will need to birth “two boys” to “keep the family name going”.
“If I do go further with Tayla will she have my last name?” Grant asked.
“That’s honestly the last issue I would have with a girl,” he said. “I’d never take a girl’s last name over mine.”
At this point in the article, I’d like to inform you, reader friend, that Grant’s surname is Crapp. Yes, Crapp.