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44 ways you can tell you are a 'good' mum.

Any of these sound familiar?

I’ve been a mum now for 11 years, and it’s only been over the past few months that I’ve really started to understand what it means to be a ‘good’ mum. Good parenting has nothing to do with how often your kids say “please” and “thank you” and nothing to do with how many A’s they get on their report cards. It has nothing to do with how quickly they fall asleep at night, and it has nothing to do with how clean their clothes are at the end of each day.

Here’s what it really means to be a ‘good’ mum:

1. You worry about them.

2. You feel guilty if they eat too much junk food.

3. You see potential danger before they do, and take steps to prevent it.

4. You let them keep their bedrooms messy even though it drives you crazy.

5. You try and make sure they are comfortable in their ice-cream-covered clothing.

6. You have some old, ratty bandaids in your handbag, for just in case.

7. You feel bad if they eat too much sugar in one day.

8. You try and think of interesting ways to get them to eat carrots.

9. You have to stop yourself from becoming verbally abusive towards anyone who upsets them.

10. You feel guilty when you get angry with them.

11. You don’t yell every day.

12. Sometimes when they have done something naughty, you laugh instead of punish.

"You're a much better mum than you realise."

13. You feel relieved when school holidays are over, and then you feel bad about that.

14. You eat one of their school snacks out of the pantry, and that makes you long for them to arrive home.

15. You make hotdogs for dinner, even though you don't like hotdogs but know that they do.

16. You buy them a puppy, even though you aren't really a dog person.

17. You are worried about the electricity bill but you turn the heater on in their room while you leave the one in yours off.

18. You offer them the last biscuit.

19. You clean up their messes sometimes because they are so focused on whatever activity they are involved in.

20. You think about them when they are away from you.

21. You feel defensive if anyone, even close family, says anything negative about them.

22. You let your oldest son get expensive haircuts because he is really fussy about his hair.

23. You charge their iPods when they forget to.

24. You kiss them and tuck them in every time you get up at night.

25. You try and keep your arguments with their dad to a minimum and as quiet as possible so they don't hear them often, if at all.

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26. You tell them stories about when you were little so they feel better about things that are happening to them.

27. You give them the answer to their homework when they are too tired to think of it themselves.

28. You know the exact temperature each of them prefers their shower water to be.

29. You buy them little bits and pieces from the shops and give it to them as a surprise.

30. You wish hugs could go on for longer than they do.

Remember this beautiful video showing kids finding their mums through smell alone?

31. You really enjoy holding them after they have fallen over and scratched their knees, because the hug duration is naturally longer.

32. You stay away from cafes that aren't kid-friendly, even though you prefer the coffee there.

33. You put on the Top 40 radio station, even though you really really wish you could put the retro station back on for their Stevie Wonder hour.

34. You say "I love you" so often that they sometimes just respond with, "I know Mum".

35. You spend a lot of time imagining them as grown ups, what they'll look like, what job they'll get, where they'll live, how often they will let you have lunch with them.

36. You discover they've made a mess, and let them revel in it for a few extra minutes before getting angry and cleaning it up.

37. You no longer cook with dried herbs because they don't eat food with 'bits of green' in it.

38. They convince you to buy them a toy when you specifically tell them you are going to the shops to buy bread and nothing else.

39. You take all the gunk out of their school lunch boxes and bags, and pant pockets.

40. Sometimes you just watch them instead of the TV.

41. You talk to them about their health, carefully explaining that they can eat chicken chips as long as they eat their vegetable sticks too.

42. You give them their dinner first, before you serve yourself.

43. You remember to clean up under their beds, when they forget to.

44. You never stop trying to do better.

What would you add to this list? What do you think makes a 'good' mum?

Watching a sleeping baby is adorable. Watching a sleeping dog is adorable. Put them together, and you've got yourself the mothership of 'adorableness.' So here's your challenge iVillagers; make it through all 10 pictures without saying "Awww!" or "That's so cute!" Believe me, it's pretty tough! by ALEX LILLY

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