reality tv

"Where do they get these people from?" Mamamia recaps The Goggleboxers watching Love Island.

Love Island is… confusing.

It’s a show about hot people… in a house… in bikinis and high heels… because… we don’t even know why?

It’s by far the trashiest thing on TV right now, and we are not the only ones with questions.

The Goggleboxers watching Love Island went… well. Post continues below video.

Video by Foxtel

The Gogglebox cast sat down to watch a heck load of reality TV this week, and while everyone’s talking about their reaction to former co-star Angie Kent on The Bachelorette… we need to draw your attention to their absolutely spot on commentary of good looking people doing not much in a Fijian mansion.

First of all, shout out to Di who only repeated one sentence but was somehow still more articulate than anything said on Love Island:

di gogglebox love island
SAME

The Goggleboxers wondered about the concept of the show, of which there isn't one, then... they considered the practical elements, like the comfort of the contestants.

"When do you wear bathers with high heels?" Lee queried.

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"And when they turn around they'll have the g-string right up the clakka," Keith responded, rightly pointing out a major health and safety issue.

Stacey and Grant, who made the wise decision to watch without the company of their six children, wondered about the casting process.

"Where do they get these people from?" asked Grant. "Do you reckon they go into, like, the toilets of nightclubs?"

He's cracked it.

Once the Love Islanders are 'coupled up', they spent some time getting to know each other.

Maurice, who is dressed in only an unbuttoned Hawaiian shirt for reasons that remain unclear, flatters his chosen lady, a 23-year-old Tasmanian waitress called Jessie.

"You're the best looking girl here," he told her. "You stood out, like massively."

Lee was not having a bar of it.

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So done

"Someone wipe his mouth, the shit's pouring out," she said, and holy sh*t I'm stealing that.

Then, with two sentences uttered, Maurice and Jessie kissed:

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Same, same and same.

The rest of the Love Island episode played out like this:

"You're so hot," said hot person one. "Thanks, you too," replied hot person two. Repeat x 6.

Then there was more kissing in bed, aptly described by Matty Fahd as "soft porn".

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He's not wrong

With Angie moving on from judging The Bachelorette to being the Bachelorette, we were grateful to Adam for keeping the tonsil hockey sound effects going, before Lee and Mick asked two very important questions...

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"BALALALALALLALA"
gogglebox love island
"Where's her hands?"
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gogglebox love island
"Where's his d*ck?"

After the riveting banter, some drama finally went down when an intruder entered the house and they all played truth or dare.

The episode ended with an almost naked man flexing his biceps, and we turned back to Di for her final verdict.

"Oh what a pity, it's finished," she said, the light behind her eyes long gone.

This was the final week of the Gogglebox season and honestly, that is a major injustice. With Love Island on for another five weeks (or five months, no one can be sure ¯\_(ツ)_/¯), we'll just have to channel our inner Di and watch it ourselves.

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