Oh boy.
Brace yourselves.
Things are about to get a lil’ bit gross.
You see, Nicole Cliffe, the former editor of The Toast, asked people on Twitter to tell her about the worst things they’ve ever eaten.
And the people motherflippin’ delivered.
Tell me about the worst thing you’ve ever eaten.
— Nicole Cliffe (@Nicole_Cliffe) March 12, 2018
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The people, well, they’ve been eatin’ a lot of bugs and mould ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ and not as many smoothie bowls and avocados as you’d expect.
They’ve also been emotionally scarred from eatin’ all those bugs and mould and what not and they need to tell us all about it.
Anyhoo, get the bucket ready and read through these bad boys.
Wow. Okay. I haven’t told this story outside of friends/family. We had a puppy. We were in the house making s’mores over the fireplace. It was dark. I dropped my chocolate. What I picked up and put in my mouth was not chocolate. It was dog poop.
— Sarah (@TheTennisstorm) March 12, 2018
One time I was removing a tick from a dog and it burst. My mouth was open. I will never make that mistake again.
— bad janet (@thesusan) March 12, 2018
Mom, sister & I split a Ghirardelli Chocolate bar in the dark watching “Cheers” on TV. My dad came down for the last 1/4th, turned on the light, and realized it was crawling with maggots.
Doctor told us to take Ipecac to throw up the maggots. There were 3 of us and 2 bathrooms.— Peter Hartlaub (@peterhartlaub) March 12, 2018
I got some kind of fancy-ass organic salad mix, and it had a LIVE BEETLE that DEFENSE MECHANISMED in my mouth, and if I loved myself I’d only eat ice berg from now on.
— Stephanie Insley Hershinow (@S_Insley_H) March 12, 2018
I used to watch my grandma’s father chew tobacco, and when I was a very small child, I thought I found some of his tobacco in the yard. It was goat poop.
— Ashley C. Ford (@iSmashFizzle) March 12, 2018
Cereal full of bugs. Like, cereal to bugs was literally 50/50. I thought my parents had some new hippie cereal that was just extra grainy or something. Was basically done by the time I realized.
— Jessica Valenti (@JessicaValenti) March 12, 2018
My grandma notoriously never threw anything away so once I cracked open a cold Pepsi at her house and took a big gulp and it was so old that every chemical had separated!!! a taste I cannot even begin to try to describe
— Caro (@socarolinesays) March 12, 2018
Once got some powdered donuts from the local hole in the wall convenience store. Got home and my wife put one in her mouth only to discover the white powder was covered in fuzzy white mold
— Pizza Shoes (@Monsterbeard) March 12, 2018
One night I brought home a drive-thru MacDonalds sundae for my partner & put it on the ground for a moment while I opened the gate in the dark, then picked it up & licked what I thought was a dribble of chocolate sauce off the lid.
IT WAS A SLUG.— Kate James (@katejames) March 12, 2018
There was also the time I was at a party and we got food from a great Mexican place and the guacamole had a Band-Aid in it.
— Mr. Jackpots (@LazlosGhost) March 12, 2018
Sea cucumber. It tastes like the dirty sand at the bottom of the ocean, only 1000x more salty.
— Dollah ???? (@jinkies) March 12, 2018
The only worse time I’ve had was at the rehearsal dinner for my brother’s wedding. A bunch of us saw a plate of what we thought were caramelized onions but were strips of jellyfish that had gone bad. It’s good that it was an outdoor wedding – lots of discreet vomiting in bushes
— Elizabeth Sampat (@twoscooters) March 12, 2018
I made bolognese and left my boyfriend alone with it for 5 minutes and he put STRAWBERRY CREAM CHOCOLATES in it “AS A JOKE” without it occurring to him that they would CLEARLY MELT and be IMPOSSIBLE TO EXTRACT so we had to eat STRAWBERRY CREAM CHOCOLATE BOLOGNESE
— M ???? (@chevalier_cygne) March 12, 2018
My MIL served her family chicken so off, it emerged from the oven a faint green. My husband said it smelled like baked death. He now sniffs everything she serves to him. Which makes her very angry.
— Bess Hamilton (@bess_p_hamilton) March 12, 2018
Yep, that just happened. We apologise in advance for the nightmares.
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