You’d have a hell of a time if you ever dared to crawl through the recesses of a first-time mother’s brain. There are hormones flying around everywhere, with assumptions and uncertainties abounding. Whether their feelings make sense to you or not, you can guarantee that every new mother you know has at one time or another worried about a slew of the most bizarre but legitimate non-issues.
1. Their baby’s poop.
Never in the history of the universe have we cared so much about another person’s bodily fluid output as we do when we’ve got an infant. Is that poop supposed to look like mustard? What are those tiny black specs? Does my baby have a secret second butthole that’s responsible for eight blowouts in a single day? Oh God. I’m not cut out for this.