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Mamamia recaps Farmer Wants A Wife: A wife just straight up... disappears.

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We open on some kelpies having a gossip. 

"Honestly this show is the best thing that ever happened to our family."  

It's time for the final single date. 

Over at Fake Farmer Sam's fake farm, he's taking Mackenzie for a real abseil over a waterfall. 

It seems... impractical. 

Seems... unnecessary.  

Over at Farmer Matt's, he and Hayley are having a... couple's massage. 

Absolutely nobody wants to lie naked next to a man they've been kinda seeing for three weeks and discuss the fact they brought another wife back... while a stranger touches their body. 

NO  

ONE.  

Farmer Andrew is taking Rachael for a ride on the back of a motorbike and then to a picnic in the paddock. 

Rachael tells Andrew she really likes him and he tells Rachael he.... doesn't feel the same way. 

She goes for a walk to have a think. 

Farmer Will is taking Kristina to my hometown of Dubbo for her final date. Lucky gal! 

He takes her to Taronga Western Plains Zoo which I definitely didn't see coming. 

"Going to Dubbo and visiting the zoo? Unheard of." 

In the Snowy Mountains, Farmer Rob and Kate are eating oysters for their final date. 

Kate... hates oysters. 

SO TRUE!  

Back at Farmer Andrew's, Rachael is still sitting by the dam feeling heartbroken.

Andrew comes over for a chat and they agree that it's time for her to head home. They go back to the farm and they tell the rest of the wives the news. They say a tearful goodbye and Rachael drives off into the distance, back to the big smoke. 

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Over at Farmer Will's, Jessica is concerned the universe's plan may have changed for her. 

She tells Will that she feels they never talk anymore and she's not even seeing the number 11 all the time anymore. 

Farmer Andrew is trying to decide between the wife who would definitely fit in at the farm and the wife who doesn't... want to. 

Andrew makes them compete in drafting the sheep for some one-on-one time and obviously Ash wins and Jess does a storm off. 

"F***KING SHEEP."  

Farmer Matt has to send three women home by the end of the night because he keeps... bringing more women back to the farm. 

He decides to rip off the bandaid and send Brydie and Jacqui home while they're eating their breakfast. He sits them both down together and says he's just not "feeling that spark and connection with you two beautiful ladies". 

They say goodbye and head back to the big city. 

Over at Farmer Andrew's, he and Ash are having their alone time together. In the back of a ute. While it rains. 

Cool.  

Farmer Will tells Jaimee and Kristina that Jessica is taking some time back at the house to think about things. 

At Farmer Rob's, Leah is making him get in the freezing cold river so he can know his mind and also his body. 

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They hold hands in the river while Rob becomes one with himself. 

At Farmer Will's it's becoming clear that Jessica is a... missing person. 

Jaimee and Kristina check the bedroom and discover that her suitcase and clothes are gone. 

Will goes to call Jessica and later when he arrives at the dinner table set for four, he says that Jessica is safe but... will not be returning. 

THE UNIVERSE LIED TO EACH AND EVERY ONE OF US BUT ESPECIALLY JESSICA. 

WHERE'D SHE GO?  

Meanwhile, the other Jess is telling Farmer Andrew that she's falling in love with him. 

He says, "I'm going to get some wood" and gets up and walks away. 

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Over at Farmer Rob's, he takes Leah for a chat and tells her that although she helped him connect with both his body and his mind, he doesn't see her as more than a friend. 

Farmer Matt takes Tara for a chat and tells her he's concerned she's going to abandon both him and their future children. 

Meanwhile, Fake Farmer Sam takes Demi for a chat and lets her know they don't have "that connection". 

She leaves the fake farm and heads back to the real city. 

Farmer Matt is still trying to make his decision. He takes Hayley for a chat and says his biggest fear is that his feelings for her aren't enough for a future. 

They go back inside and then Matt decides to tell Hayley she's going home in front of the other two wives. 

She says goodbye and heads back to the city. I will personally miss her saying things are "a f***ing joke" and also hitting on her farmer's best friend. 

WE. WILL. MISS. YOU. EACH. AND. EVERY. DAY. 

SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME SHE GAVE HIS BEST FRIEND AARON A CALL. 

UNTIL TOMORROW NIGHT. 

Keryn Donnelly is Mamamia's Pop Culture Editor. For more of her TV, film and book recommendations and to see photos of her dog, follow her on Instagram

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Feature Image: Channel Seven.