It was a size four Maggie Sottero designer gown. As soon as I put it on, I knew it was the dress.
My grandmother, mother, and sister were with me when I tried it on and stood cautiously in front of the three-way mirrors on the pedestal outside the dressing room.
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The dress shopping day soon became a tradition among wedding plans, as each of us sisters repeated it when we got engaged. It was one of my most favourite and cherished memories with my grandmother, who passed away recently after a painful struggle with mental health issues for much of the latter part of her life.
I distinctly remember trying on this dress and my grandma starting to cry. I was the oldest grandchild, and we had shared a special bond. Seeing me married was something she often told me she doubted she would see due to her struggles.
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The day of the dress shopping was wonderful, glorious, and full of memories with my grandmother. The last memory I had with her before I committed myself to a man; a bittersweet moment that symbolised a goodbye of my former life as a single girl.
The last memory I had with her while still being the independent woman she so effortlessly illustrated for me with her own remarkable life.
The reality of divorcing a narcissist.
I am now desperate to divorce a man who refuses to return my wedding dress, despite me sending copious emails in which I am begging for my cherished dress to be returned, in addition to asking my lawyers to ask his lawyer, all of which have proven to be ineffective.
This is the reality of divorcing a narcissist who tries to do anything and everything they can to hurt you.
Besides being somewhat disturbing, it is also very sad, because it shows the level of destruction that a very miserable person wishes to enact upon another, in the form of punishment for setting boundaries that any reasonable and healthy person would set. Boundaries that I would want my daughters and sons to set if they had similar experiences in any relationship.