There’s only one way to shut down critics who spout homophobic taunts about you in the media; Respond with humour.
In a monologue at the beginning of her show, Ellen read out a quote from Pastor Larry Tomczak in his offensive-to-absolutely-everyone article titled, “Are you aware of the avalanche of gay programming assaulting your home?”
The quote said: “Ellen DeGeneres celebrates her lesbianism and “marriage” in between appearances of guests like Taylor Swift to attract young girls.”
Ellen, of course, wasn’t going to let that one fly.
She called out the ridiculous claim and delivered an equal-parts hilarious and passionate response.
If you can’t watch the video right now, her monologue is below in full:
“OK, let’s just break this down. First of all, I’m not ‘married’. I’m married. That’s all. And, Larry, I don’t even know what it means to celebrate my lesbianism. I mean…Well, I guess I do. Like that! Yay! I’m gay! In the article, the pastor criticizes a lot of TV shows for promoting gay agendas. He says that Glee has over five characters.
Modern Family had a gay wedding. Anderson Cooper boasts about his homosexuality.
If you ask me, Larry is watching a lot of gay TV. His solution is for parents to encourage their kids to watch classic TV shows like Little House on the Prairie and I Love Lucy. It’s not like I Love Lucy is a great example for kids! She’s shoving all that chocolate in her mouth! That’s not good for kids. And then I did some research, and if you don’t think Lucy and Ethel had something going on, explain this.
If that’s not gay…That’s all us gays do…The only way I’m trying to influence people is to be more kind and compassionate with one another. That is the message I’m sending out. I don’t have an agenda. I’m not here to brainwash anyone. But…Listen to the sound of my voice.
Attention youth of the world: I want you to live your lives being exactly who you are. Be true to yourself—the most important thing is to be true to yourself. The second most important thing is that you wear Ellen underwear and only Ellen underwear.”
Boom. If that’s not killing hate with humour, we don’t know what is.