Today was my last day doing president.
I feel two things at the one time. The first is anger. Specifically towards Sleepy Joe and his stupid face. The second is joy because not being president means I can now play golf seven days a week instead of six.
People seem to be interested in how I'm spending this last day, even though I made it pretty clear in my schedule. I wrote in big writing that I was working 'from early in the morning until late in the evening' and was making 'many calls and having many meetings', so why the questions??
Anyway, I thought I’d write down what my last day as president looked like because it’s very funny but also very important. I would say it’s actually the most funny final day of being president ever. Melania didn’t laugh but I think that might be because she doesn't want to be married anymore.
But enough about Melania. Today was about me and the end of my presidenting. Here's how it went.
The first thing I did was wake up and do a wee. I did a little bit of wee on the toilet seat and also on the floor so it would be sticky for Joe. I woke up Baron to show him but he just muttered, 'dad, no,' and he can't tell me what to do.
Then I made my way to my computer. A president is very busy and important, you see.
I went to www.google.com and typed in the search phrase 'what did lil wayne do and should i pardon him y/n'. I decided... yes.