When I was very young and very stupid, I had an intense love/hate relationship with a guy.
The highs were fabulous and the lows, of course, devastating. But I kept coming back, I kept hoping the lows would fade and the highs would take over. I kept hoping the highs would be everything.
For the last ten years I’ve had the same relationship with Christmas. One minute I’m flying on a cloud imagining the fun and joy around the tree Christmas morning, the next someone is shoving a Wish List my way where the cheapest gift is $169 and is more of the same technology I am actively trying to reduce in the house.
Watch Penny give Sheldon his dream gift from The Big Bang Theory below:
Last weekend I went to do some Christmas shopping. Teachers, friends, relatives. I deliberately didn’t try to achieve too much. I had a plan. I sat on a couch at the shopping centre and had a strategic think. I was not going to let this get the better of me. I was not going to let this become a low. Intricate and pretty snowflake decorations dangled above my head, Christmas jingles played and I secretly enjoyed those songs. They made me feel something that must be close to child-like. They took me back to a time when things weren’t so complicated. Where there was space.
I was determined to not get “caught up” in the shopping madness. I was going to remember what Christmas was really all about. I swear I saw light shoot out the nose of a dangling Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer and strike me in the heart.
Then a woman carrying three throw pillows got angry at me. I made a Christmas shopping mistake. I tried to return items.
I stood at the counter and the paperwork was much bigger than anticipated for two European pillow covers that ended up not being the right grey. The woman next to me had four beach towels and three tasteful throw pillows and she was not happy. She huffed and puffed. She rearranged the throw pillows on the counter and I was glad they were inanimate objects. She slapped at the towels. She exhaled, sighed and, if those throw pillows had heads, that’s where she punched them.