Image: iStock. By Giana Ciapponi for Ravishly.
You’re in a social circle—be it at school, work, neighborhood, wherever—and you click with everyone except that one person. Try as you might, having a conversation that doesn’t revolve around the weather feels like a root canal. Or worse, you flat-out don’t like each other, but for the sake of social fluidity, you’re forced to feign friendliness. Should you fight the feeling?
Find some common ground and force a relationship? Or is it better to accept that it just ain’t happening and move on?
Our advice: Accept it. Why? If the person doesn’t dig you, their criticisms may guide you to self-improvement. Not everyone has to like you. In fact, esteemed writer Paulo Coelho (of The Alchemist) once said:
If everybody loves you, something is wrong. Find at least one enemy to keep you alert.
Our friends can be a tad generous when describing us, and these niceties won’t help us become better people. A pal, for instance, may say “Giana is pretty and dresses nicely.”
An enemy, on the other hand, might instead say, “Giana is shallow and narcissistic.” In a way, they’re both saying the same thing—they’re just shrouded in different connotations.
No one wants to be “shallow and narcissistic” (unless you’re Jessica Wakefield of Sweet Valley), but hearing that kind of feedback may help you change. And while your friends find your negative attributes tolerable, that doesn’t mean that—for instance—a future boss will. (Jessica Rowe on her number one piece of advice she would like to share with others. Post continues after video.)