I have a confession: I have become that friend.
I am the friend who brings their partner to dinner without asking, the friend whose social media posts make you gag and the friend you haven’t seen in months.
I’m sorry. It’s not you, it’s us.
The following is a list of all the ways I, and others like me, have hurt you.
1.) I am no longer a 'me' but a 'we'.
We can no longer speak in first person. We try but it just doesn't feel right. What am "I" doing this weekend? I have no idea. But we're going apple-picking. We love apples.
2.) I have used every opportunity to talk about my partner.
I can't help that I try to slip them into unrelated conversations. The thought of them sits in my chest like vomit after three bottles of wine. I must tell you about our couples getaway. I MUST.
3.) I have tried to convince you this relationship is different.
I have gone to extreme lengths to explain to you how this relationship is different. I have become irrationally offended when you pointed out similarities to past flings. I have told you that you're wrong. Loudly.