As told to Shona Hendley.
A few months ago, my partner, Nathan* and I were in bed together having one of those sporadic, intimate conversations, sharing our feelings openly and honestly.
It was one of those understated, unplanned moments that seemed romantic, beautiful and like something you would look back on in years to come and smile about fondly.
We lay there, intertwined, discussing our own relationship and the stage we were currently in, how everything seemed as it should be and that for us it was just perfect. It was like one of those movie scenes – an incidental, yet profound moment that unexpectedly brings characters even closer together that before; making them unbreakable.
Watch: Relationship deal breakers. Post continues below.
Nathan and I have been together for two years and throughout that time we had always seemed in step with each other, at the same point on the same page with everything, especially (I had thought) in how we viewed our relationship – where it was and where it was going.
But as we opened up to each other that day, I mentioned our future, specifically that I saw us one day being married but even if we didn’t officially tie the knot that it wouldn’t matter because we would be together forever.
Although neither of us had ever mentioned marriage or the idea of ‘forever’ before, I wasn’t concerned about saying it, I was so confident Nathan felt the same way.
Instead, Nathan’s reply turned all of what I had believed on its head.
"We won’t be together forever," he said to me almost nonchalantly. "I love you; I adore you and I love where we are now, but this won’t be my forever relationship. There’s nothing wrong, I just don’t see that for us, I never have."
I stood staring at him, shocked, devastated but without the ability to reply. My silence was enough for him to realise that what he said may have been clear to him, but it certainly wasn’t to me.
"Nina*, I love you. I want to be with you now, isn’t that what matters the most?” he asked me.