There’s a lot of dating advice on the Internet. A LOT.
But for straight males, the world of women apparently remains baffling. Which is why it’s excellent that someone has finally worked out the secret to successful, romantic relationships.
And no, it’s not Oprah. It’s not Brené Brown or Esther Perel.
It’s a woman by the name of Nannette LaRee Hernandez, and you might have stumbled across her advice on a post being shared around the place that’s titled: “Men, Never Be Catfished, Used For A Meal, Or Stuck In A Sexless Relationship Again”.
See, if you ask Nannette, feminism — more specifically, the “the pernicious #MeToo Faction” — is what’s to blame for men being unable to find “a good woman”.
Writing on her website – which we don’t want to link to, because, ick – she explained: “These days more-than ever, a Man must take every precaution to protect himself, and he must do everything in his power to lower his chances of being used, abused or falsely accused”.
And that’s where the dating guide comes in. Or, as Nannette writes: “This is a Man’s World and the cleverest way to take back the castle is to completely cease giving women what they need,” she wrote, “after decades of women refusing to give Men what they want.”
So here are some out-takes from the handy guide for Alpha Males approaching the dating scene. We’re hoping that sharing these can serve as a public service announcement. As in, if he mentions any of them, RUN.
“Ask her to please come to your first date wearing no makeup.”
“One of the multiple complaints that Men have, is that the woman they see online is never the woman that they get in person. Here is your #1 Clue as to how Real she truly is: ask her to please come to your first date wearing no make-up.
“If she refuses your request to show up to your first date as her natural self, then again, you’ve just dodged a bullet.”
So alpha males don’t understand make-up? Is that it? But we thought they were smart…
“If a woman is keen to immediately bring you around her children… she is beyond dangerous and you’re far safer sleeping with a grenade.”
“Know this now,” she wrote, “any woman who does not have the instinct to protect her own flesh and blood will think nothing of cutting you and laughing while you bleed.”