Grab some batteries because science says you should be masturbating during self-isolation.

Yes, the time has come for many of us to self-isolate. Which means a lot of streaming Stan and Netflix.

Should you get bored, you might reach for some goodies in your top drawer. Imagine the horror if your fave toy was broken? Or out of batteries?

It’s time to start thinking about what you need in your home quarantine kit to keep your mind and body happy. Because in case you didn’t know, an orgasm a day can really keep the doctor away.

I’m serious! In fact, indulging in some self-love might be one of the most productive ways to spend your time in isolation.

Masturbating boosts your immune system and raises your white blood cell count. According to Dr Jennifer Landa, masturbation might be just what you need to strengthen your body’s natural defence forces.

Her views are backed up by a Department of Medical Psychology at the University Clinic of Essen (in Germany) study which looked at the effects of orgasm through masturbation on white blood cell count.

A group of 11 volunteers were asked to participate in a study and the results confirmed that sexual arousal and orgasm increased the number of white blood cells. White blood cells help fight off infections.

That’s not all – orgasms help you relax your body and calm your mind, meaning a better sleep, which in turn means more time for your body to rest. Rest is crucial in maintaining a high-functioning immune system.

When you climax through masturbation your body gets a rush of feel-good hormones (such as dopamine, serotonin and oxytocin). This wonderful rush re-balances your levels of cortisol (the stress hormone). This all helps boost your immune system to get it functioning well.

Honestly, it’s science!

So, grab some Dettol, Panadol and a couple of cans of tinned tomatoes, whatever you need to get through. But don’t forget the other things you’ll need…


Two weeks at home? How much lube can you use? Make sure you stock up in advance so you’re not left high and dry (sorry). Grab a long-lasting lubricant with a pop-top on a large bottle (270ml is good). That way you won’t run out.


Make sure you have batteries. If you want to care for the environment, consider getting a toy that doesn’t require batteries and instead has a USB charger. That way you’ll never be left without a buzz!


The Satisfyer Pro 2.0, the toy everyone is losing their mind over, has a charger and since it’s such a quick toy to use, you barely ever have to charge it.

A cleaner for your toys

Water isn’t enough. Use a foam wash for your toys that’s gentle enough that you can use on your hands as well. A cleansing foam is a great idea.

The one I use is an alcohol-free formula to thoroughly clean your toys, offering reliable protection against a range of bacteria, viruses and fungi.


Board games don’t have to be boring. Why not spice things up with an R-rated game?

The Lust Board Game is hilarious and a heap of fun. Put on Married at First Sight as foreplay – it will remind you how strong your marriage is.

Listen to Mamamia’s sex podcast, Sealed Section. On this episode, Rachel Corbett, Samantha X and Dr. Lauren Rosewarne explore everything there is to know about the female orgasm. Post continues below.

A waterproof toy

Jump in the shower with your favourite toy to have some good, clean fun. These days there are so many waterproof toys. The Satisfyer G-spot rabbit was one of the most popular toys in Australia last year – probably in part because it’s waterproof, so great for the shower or bath.


The other benefit to being well-stocked is that if you’re dating, you won’t feel tempted by a late-night, potentially contagious, booty call! But if you really want to see your lover, be careful.

Reuters reported that condom sales have shot up in China, where COVID-19 was first detected. According to the Centers of Disease Control and Prevention, the main method of transmission of the coronavirus is person-to-person contact.

If you’re kissing or having sex with someone who has COVID-19 or might do – well, common-sense says that’s risky. Condoms are always good no matter what.

So, there you have it! Be safe out there.

Feature Image: Getty.

00:00 / ???