A few days ago, my boyfriend told me he knew after three weeks that I was the one. Based on his behaviour in those three weeks, this honestly didn’t surprise me.
We met on a whim on a dating app when I was looking for something really casual. I had just ended a three-year relationship, and wasn’t looking to jump into anything even remotely serious.
After we hung out for the first time, Dan became pretty clingy. In fact, it was almost refreshing. With Dan, there were no mixed signals. Not even from the beginning.
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He’d text me when he woke up, throughout the day, and asked me to hang out frequently. Prior to my three-year relationship, I was basically accustomed to the dating runaround. I talked to countless guys who I still, to this day, am not sure were ever truly interested.
All of this newfound transparency would have been amazing, except I wasn’t in that mindset at all. I was in the opposite mindset.
I made this pretty clear to Dan the first time he outright told me he wanted to exclusively date.
“I’m not really ready for all that. I like spending time with you, but I can’t promise exclusivity or any sort of commitment. I understand if you want to stop seeing me because of that,” I’d say, feeling a slight twinge of guilt.
Still, he continued to pursue me.
Several months went by, and he remained adamant that when I was ready, he wanted to commit to an exclusive relationship.
His desire for it never faltered, not even one day of those four months we had been casual.
I decided to give him a chance. But something started to weigh on me even before we had become exclusive. In the immortal words of Mariah Carey, why was Dan so obsessed with me?
We hadn’t even really known each other long before he wanted to commit. It was truly within a week that Dan had started to develop intense feelings for me.
Several questions revolved around my head. Was he like this with every girl? Was he just desperate to have a relationship? Was he lonely? Was it just physical attraction? Was he immature? Was he bored? Did he think I was rich and wanted to use me as a means to enter a certain lifestyle?
These questions were basically on a loop in my mind on a daily basis. I didn’t know how he could feel so strongly after such little time. It made me certain that he had some ulterior motive in dating me.