First problem, it’s cold. And that, by any Australian standard, is not at all in the Christmas spirit.
I realise my good fortune (also sheltered?) that I’m older than 25 and this is my first Christmas away from home. Also that I am able to have a Christmas away from home in the first instance.
But there we have it. It’s cold. There are real live Christmas trees on street corners. There is no one who will call me by my childhood nickname, and everyone keeps looking at me like I’m crazy when I say I want to go swimming.
It all appears as if it’s out of a movie. Beautifully manicured and a world away (quite literally) from a normal hodge-podge Christmas affair in the backyard of a family member’s house where the sweat dripping down my back is in concert with the condensation on my glass, and the ice in the esky is definitely melting despite our best efforts at persuading it not to.
Here, there’s no esky needed and outside is definitely not an option.
LISTEN: Is it ever appropriate for a family member to invite you for Christmas lunch, then charge $50 a head? We discuss, on Mamamia Out Loud. Post continues after.
There is no brother to argue with about who will make the salad and who will do the dishes. I’m attempting to find a replacement – someone who is tall and loud and will clutch upon every conversation as an opportunity for disagreement. But so far, no one has been quite as beautifully though infuriatingly engaging.
I’m also trying to find a mother, who might wake up early – before anyone else – and not-so-subtly pace the house so we might get to the gift exchange already.