"It went... everywhere.": 9 women share their most chaotic parenting moments and now I think I need to lay down.

Before I became a mother I thought I was a pretty ‘together’ person, handling most of life’s curveballs with grace and ease.   

Ha. Then I had children.     

And life became a truckload trickier, stickier and more… chaotic.     

I’ll never forget the time my then 2-year-old lost his mind halfway through the weekly grocery shop when I refused to buy him a toy car. Every parent can picture it. He cried, screamed and thrashed about while I madly whipped the trolley around the aisles throwing groceries in and desperately trying to calm down my kid. 

Ten minutes (read: basically a lifetime) of high decibel screaming – and many judgemental stares – later, I couldn’t take it anymore. 

But I was stuck. No way was I abandoning my 90 per cent finished grocery shop, but my child was hysterical and I wasn’t far off, either.

So I stopped short in the toilet paper aisle, pulled him into a cuddle sat down on the floor and together we sobbed our eyes out. We sat bawling, while other shoppers avoided eye contact, then I called my husband to come and get us. 

Ah, memories. 

Side note: Listen to Mamamia's podcast for parents of little kids, This Glorious Mess. Post continues below. 

Inspired by Chux’s movement to have us all share our funniest stuck moments, I asked 8 other parents to throw caution to the wind, and put their most entertaining, chaotic, how-could-this-actually-happen kind of stories on the table. 

While Chux can’t exactly stop us parents feeling stuck in these tricky parenting situations, they’re the experts in stopping food from getting stuck to our sponge. Chux’s new DishPro Non-Scratch Scrubbing Sponge (for pots, pans and plates) and DishPro Non-Scratch Flexi Cleaner (for tricky corners and curves) help to solve tricky problems in the kitchen. The Chux DishPro loves doing dishes more than you — it avoids food clog whilst resisting odours and bacteria, and prevents food from getting stuck. Ultimately, giving you a more hygienic clean.

Now, to the stories. I felt much better when I heard these stories from 8 fellow parents. If you’re ready to hear them, strap in.

Leah: “It went… everywhere.”

“I took my newly toilet-trained daughter to the park sans spare clothes because finally, we were over that phase. Soon she needed a wee and there were no public toilets, so I thought, ‘bush wee it is’ – quite hard with toddler girls. Wee went… everywhere. I’m talking dress, knickers, socks, her shoes, my shoes. I stripped her off, found an old too-small zippy suit in my bag, shoved her legs in the armholes and carried her all the way home.”

Ursula: “One word: gastro.”

“My one-year-old got gastro while we were on Christmas holidays with my in-laws. Ten days of symptoms she was finally better by New Year’s Eve, so off we went to a Thai restaurant for dinner. We’ve just relaxed and started enjoying our meal when my daughter projectile spews (exorcist style!) all over our table and the floor. 

“I stripped her down and wiped her off with paper towel in the bathroom, then carried her, starkers, through the restaurant out to the car while the poor staff dealt with the aftermath.”

Tanya: “My toddler thought the handbag was a potty.”

“My toddler thought that a handbag sitting on the ground at a festival looked like a potty. I was busy feeding his younger sister and before I could stop him, he’d weed in the bag. As in… someone else’s bag. I gave the lady all the cash in my purse to replace it, apologised profusely and left!”

Shannon: “We dry retched all the way home.”

“After a lovely dinner out my husband and I were walking to the car with our baby daughter when my husband realises he has poo all over his arm and hand.  We open the car boot to change her there, and the poo is gigantic and EVERYWHERE. 

“It felt like a movie moment when we realise we only have one baby wipe left, which happened to get caught by the wind and flitter away. So we wiped her down with her clothes, put her in the car seat, opened the windows and dry retched all the way home.”

Zara: “I realised I’d locked it all in the car.”

“At 37 weeks pregnant I was buying Easter eggs with my 1.5-year-old on a 30 degree Easter Saturday. I loaded the bags of chocolate onto the passenger seat of the car, shut the door and turned to lift my toddler out of the trolley and into her car seat when I realised I’d locked my phone, keys and wallet in the car. 

“After a few deep breaths I returned to the store, asked to borrow an employee’s phone, called roadside assistance, where I then needed to join up to the service right then and there over the phone, so they’d send someone out to unlock my car. I then sat, heavily pregnant with a toddler, by the locked car and waited an hour and a half for them to arrive. Spoiler: all the chocolate melted over the car seat.”

Belinda: “It was the most stressful hour of my life.” 

“My daughter – who had just finished toilet training – got diarrhoea 3 minutes into a flight from Melbourne to Sydney. It went through all her clothes and I had no spares or supplies on me, because I naively thought I was done with all that. So, in we went to the tiny plane toilet with the tiniest basin to wash her in (!!!!). 

“Poo got on everything, including me, and the smell then wafted through the whole cabin. I dressed her in my cardi on top and my sons hoodie on the bottom and prayed mightily that there was no more poo for the rest of the flight. It was the most stressful hour of my life.”

Casey: “I was mortified.”

“I was heavily pregnant and took my kids, 4 and 2, to the park. The 2-year-old climbed on a high ledge and was then too scared to go down the slide. I was too pregnant to climb up to get her, so tried to gently coax her down while she proceeded to freak out. 

“At that moment, my 4-year-old needed the toilet, suddenly ‘busting’. I couldn’t leave my distressed 2 year-old so I told the 4-year-old to duck behind a nearby bush. She chose a different bush I’d suggested, located between the main road and groups of families picnicking… removing her clothes and plunging into a standing naked wee. I was mortified.”

Ciara: “I end up running to a nearby Bunnings to get pliers! Fun times.”

“We took our 8-week-old to the shops, in the baby capsule, and had used the adaptors to connect the capsule to the pram base. At leaving time – with our screaming, overstimulated baby – we realised my husband has put the adaptors on backwards and they wouldn’t actually come off. So, meaning: we can’t get the baby in the car. Fun times. I end up running to a nearby Bunnings to get pliers to pry the adaptors off in the car park!”

Feel like you need a lie down? Me too. 

To celebrate our most chaotic moments, Mamamia is partnering with Chux to give one lucky winner a chance to win a year of dinners straight to their door and a Chux prize pack. For your chance to win, we want to hear about your funniest 'stuck' moment. Enter the competition here.

Feature Image: Getty/Mamamia.