The rise of the body-as-fashion?
“We’ve officially entered a realm that you might call post-fashion. The body is the new outfit,” wrote Veronique Hyland.
And what a body.
Where once dresses were craftily designed to cinch, hide, accentuate or smooth, they’re now designed for maximum exposure – all the better to reveal all those hours in the gym, and all those activated almonds.
And just as regular folks can’t afford the average Narciso Rodriguez red carpet frock, the red-carpet body is equally unaffordable.
At their beck and call celebrities have personal trainers, nutritionists, chefs and a whole health-food store worth of organic, probiotic, all-natural groceries.
Oh, and if you can’t get it naturally? You can pay for perfectly shaped butt or boobs, or liposculpture on any part of your body that’s not quite “right”.
Today’s models and movie stars maintain the health and fitness regimen of elite athletes.
Gwyneth Paltrow works out for two hours a day, six days a week. She “would rather smoke crack than eat cheese from a tin” and frequently makes pronouncements on how easy it is to be thin and healthy with the self-described “butt of a 22-year-old stripper” while simultaneously recommending $10 jars of probiotic honey, duck eggs, kale juice and many, many limes.
Supermodel Gisele Bundchen, mother of two, completes an hour of yoga every morning, 90 minutes of kung fu three times a week a week, regular Tracy Anderson classes and frequent running.
Madonna’s notoriously punishing exercise regimen and sinewy arms have resulted in a chain of her own Hard Candy gyms.
Fitness experts such as Tracy Anderson are gurus, their instructions followed with unswerving dedication by their celebrity devotees.
Sculpted arms, muscular bums, taut stomachs and lithe, toned silhouettes are de rigeur on red carpets, and they don’t come easy.