Why Cassandra Thorburn doesn't deserve to be Australia's jilted ex-wife.

If you didn’t know, there was a celebrity wedding in Mexico last weekend. Karl Stefanovic and Jasmine Yarbrough tied the knot officially, even though technically it was their third ceremony.

The reports came through social media thick and fast. The location, the dress and the celebrity guests. By all accounts it seemed the couple had a lovely celebration. And why wouldn’t they? Their wedding should be one of the happiest days of their lives.

But inevitably within 24 hours of the wedding, articles on Cassandra Thorburn, Karl’s ex-wife, were splashed throughout the media. ‘Cassandra’s opinion…’ ‘What Cassandra was doing’, ‘Cassandra says Karl isn’t the person who you think he is…’

On this week’s episode of Mamamia Out Loud, Mia Freedman, Holly Wainwright and Jessie Stephens discuss whether or not Karl Stefanovic is a hypocrite for selling his wedding photos. Post continues…

Frankly, if I knew my famous ex-husband of 21 years was getting married on a particular weekend I’d have taken myself off to Thailand, been beachside, cocktail in hand, book in the other, with tears probably streaming down my face the whole time… but out of reach of the media’s ever watchful eye.

 

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Cassandra is braver then me, flying into Sydney over the weekend to appear on Studio 10. And alas, paparazzi caught her at the airport and managed to get shots of exactly what they wanted. No make-up, untamed hair, basic shirt, jeans and slides.

Compared to her ex-husband’s released wedding photos, styled to perfection, she never had a chance. Thus, playing straight into the media’s portrayal of her as the jilted ex-wife. This is the part I find so incredibly unfair.

Every time I see Cassandra’s name, I cannot help but think of Jennifer Aniston. Two women constantly being dragged through the mud, time after time, when their ex-husband appears in the public eye with a new girl on their arm. Brad gets divorced from Angelina and suddenly Jennifer’s trying to get him back. Cassandra reads the Handmaid’s Tale and somehow it’s a subtle message in relation to Karl. It’s ridiculous and it has to stop. It does nothing to empower these women about themselves and the rich fulfilling lives they lead. It must be exhausting for them and neither of them deserve it.

Cassandra Thorburn admits to snooping on an ex’s phone on Studio Ten. Post continues below…

If Cassandra and Karl were married for 21 years, that means she was 26 years old and Karl was 24. Being in love at this age, is very different from being in love with the people you become 20 years later. Things change, often feelings change and sometimes relationships change along with it.

Cassandra’s story is no different from the countless other women I have met throughout my life who are in their 40s or 50s. Divorced, the husband either cheated, or was the one to end the marriage. Typically, they have found a younger woman with a more carefree lifestyle, and then eventually these men launch themselves into family number two. It is so cliché. So why Cassandra has such intense media focus on her when this happens so frequently amongst the general population I find somewhat bemusing.

For some reason the media feels showcasing Cassandra as broken hearted and spiteful, instead of allowing her the space to heal from a broken marriage, and recover from the recent loss of her Father, is somehow justifiable. It sells more magazines right? The jilted ex-wife means a good scandal. It doesn’t matter that they separated two and a half years ago, it does not matter there’s no PR budget for a publicist to defend her or security detail to protect her from the exhausting paparazzi unless she’s picking up those costs, and it does not matter she is entitled to a private life given she’s actually not a public figure.

And what about when her ex-husband and his new wife one day announce they’re pregnant? If that is the path they take. No doubt, Cassandra will be dragged into the whole mess again, against her will and for nothing other than to once again showcase her as the jilted ex-wife.

Ultimately Cassandra deserves to live her life without her ex-husband’s shadow constantly looming over her head. I just hope someday the media realises that too.

Cassandra Griffin is a wife and mother who is balancing work, adjusting to motherhood, living in the U.K. and dealing with every other adventure as it comes her family’s way.

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