A mother is finding herself in the throes of some difficult parenting waters, taking to platform Mumsnet to share her concern for her daughter’s steadfast desire to become a stay-at-home mum.
The woman wrote her 24-year-old daughter had only recently qualified as a midwife and had been working in London for just a few months.
“Recently, she informed me she is planning to leave her career behind, as they are trying for a baby, and her ultimate ambition is to become a housewife/stay at home mum. Admittedly, her and her new husband are financially well-off, and so she doesn’t have the financial incentive to work.
“It’s all so clear to her, but so, so muggy for me. I can’t get my head around it and feel so disappointed. After three years of gruelling training at university, landing a London hospital job and beginning to move up the ranks, I just can’t understand how she can give it all up so easily,” the mum wrote.
The concerned woman added midwifery isn’t a job her daughter will be able to walk back into, and if she does decide to re-enter the workforce, she will have to “go back and re-train”.
“This doesn’t come as a complete shock – she has always dreamt [sic] of being a housewife, ever since being a teenager – but I’m astounded she’s really going ahead with it now.
“I have not yet spoken to her about how I truly feel, and my plan is to await responses on here before deciding on whether to do that, and how to say it,” she wrote.
Love yourself a parenting dilemma? Check out our parenting podcast.
Responses to the dilemma appeared to be remarkably divided, with some advising the woman “says nothing” and “mind her own business”, and others sure of the woman’s responsibility to approach her daughter.
“How is she going to protect herself financially? Have they legally binding agreements regarding access to money and what will happen if he can no longer work? What will the expectations be?” one posed.
“I’d say let her get on with it, pre-children we all have dreams and as you know life changes drastically when they arrive, she may love being a stay at home mum or she may be keen to get back to work for something different to do. Either way she is very young to be making permanent decisions so try not to get disheartened,” another wrote.
What do you think? Is it ever OK to weigh in on your children’s dreams?