A weather problem and a fashion malfunction: Everything you missed on the Brit Awards red carpet.

by Chelsea McLaughlin February 20, 2020

Help.

I’m confused.

Everything I’ve ever learned about weather and hemispheres and Britannia had me believing it would be COLD AS HELL in London at this current moment, but the Brit Awards happened yesterday and why was everyone dressed like they’re in Ibiza???

I do not understand how it is possible to walk a red carpet with 90 per cent of your skin exposed and not have goosebumps or that weird purple tone I turn when it’s chilly.

Side note: We reviewed non-family friendly fashion and it was… interesting. Post continues below video.

There were simply far too many visible abdominal muscles given it was NINE DEGREES CELSIUS YOU GUYS, Lizzo was a walking chocolate bar and one woman hedged her bets, wearing an umbrella in the form of a fancy hat.

Behold, the many red carpet moments that require our immediate attention.

Harry Styles is a sweet angel who loves his grandma.

Sometimes the Brit Awards fall on the same day you usually visit your grandma for afternoon tea.

And when that happens Grandma absolutely will not let you leave until you’ve 1. Eaten more biscuits than ever necessary and 2. Borrowed enough of her clothing to ensure not one inch of your body will feel a cool draft.

Grandma is so proud sweetie. Image: Getty.

LIZZO HAS WARMED OUR COLD, COLD HEARTS.

Lizzo came dressed as a chocolate bar and basically, we love her with our whole hearts and that is all.

Lizzo just eradicated lactose intolerance. Image: Getty.

Ellie Golding hasn't purchased a new blanket in... too long.

Rumour has it Ellie Golding was watchingCheeron Netflix all day and then realised she probably shouldn't have watched episode six because she then had to rush to get ready but also how could she walk a red carpet without knowing how Navarro went at Daytona???

Thankfully she was already lying under her old crochet blanket. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

A snuggie, but make it fashion. Image: Getty.

Well. I'm shivering just looking at these.

Absolutely none of these women listened to their mothers, who were yelling about how they definitely needed to pack a jacket and WHY NOT? MUM IS ALWAYS RIGHT.

This is TV presenter Laura Whitmore:

Why is your bag the warmest thing about this outfit. Image: Getty.

And this is fellow fluffy bag carrier Ashley Roberts, who I just Googled and discovered she is a PUSSYCAT DOLL so contractually obliged to have abs like that:

I hope out of view is an assistant holding a turtleneck thermal. Image: Getty.

I've been to London and swimming is not a thing that is done on the reg especially in FEBRUARY, dear person apparently named Daisy Maskell:

This is highly impractical. Image: Getty.

Singer Mollie King is trying not to look cold but it's not working:

I don't know where your arms are but I hope they're toasty. Image: Getty.

Okay so have you ever felt how cold metal can get??? Like imagine wrapping yourself in it??? IsLove Islandstar Montana Brown okay?

BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. Image: Getty.

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Billie Eilish looked 1. warm and 2. very much like Billie Eilish.

Billie Eilish is 18 and made the most practical fashion decision of the night which is odd considering her nails are literally THIS long:

I don't know how you... do things. Image: Getty.

BUT YOU LOOK REAL COZY. Image: Getty.

One should never underestimate London's ability to... rain.

Paloma Faith has no faith (not sorry) in the city's weather so she made sure she covered all her bases. If it didn't rain, she had a chic hat and if it did... Heck yes that is wearable umbrella and it's genius:

I'M ALREADY STANDING UNDER MY UMBRELLA ELLA ELLA EH EH EH. Image: Getty.

Someone turned a fashion malfunction into alook.

Model Abbey Clancy stood on the back of her dress and it ripped (an unverified claim), accidentally exposing her bum. That was annoying because like, she was already chilly and having cold wind on the buttocks is not at all pleasant, ya know?

I'VE GOT AN ICEBOX WHERE MY BUM USED TO BE. Image: Getty.

I really want to know what happens when those henchmen let go of this woman's hair.

Also, will they help with the diabolical wedgie reported American singer Ashnikko will need to extract at the end of the night?

No further comment. Image: Getty.

THE MEN WERE SO WARM AND IT'S TRULY UNFAIR.

I, a woman, feel nothing but contempt for the weather-appropriate, cozy looking jackets of these men.

Body warmth. Clever. Image: Getty.

I begrduge how warm Kiefer Sutherland looks. Image: Getty.

I feel it is important to point out that Lewis Capaldi looks like this on the same red carpet Lizzo dressed as a chocolate bar. Image: Getty.

Me: "How would you describe this look?" My colleague: "A Tic Tac, but make it fashion."

Getty Images listed this man's name as just 'Dave' and I was very confused, because, Dave, you can't be called just Dave, but then I Googled Dave and it turns out Dave's IS called just Dave:

Dave, you're good. Image: Getty.

Dear friends, meet Rag'n'Bone Man:

He could've worn any jacket but he chose this one and that is a decision we must all live with. Image: Getty.

Finally, I present the smartest person of the night... A man named Burna Boy:

YOU SIR, ARE A GENIUS. Image: Getty.

So, yeah. Life's unfair, I guess.