Being a parent is no easy task. The biggest problem in becoming a parent is realising we don’t really know whom we are raising. We can instill the best of our knowledge, the kindest manners, and provide the best education to our children and in the end, it comes down to the choices that child wants to make for him or herself.
As a step-parent, you come into the post-divorce messed up parental equation realising that you don’t know squat about the children or their past.
You could rely on the parents (the person you are dating and their counter part) but ultimately, you are just collecting data that is based, primarily on the opinion of a loving parent who genuinely wants the best for their child, a child you are taking on whether you want to or not.
I have been fortunate… well, let’s be honest, my children have been fortunate. The two fathers that helped to create these really cool kids chose women that I don’t have to worry or stress over. There is nothing inappropriate that has taken place.
No tears or anxiety follow my children home after spending time with their dads and step-mums. These two women out-shined me as a step-mum, for certain.
Though I remedied my wrongs and foul errors as a stepmum they still out-did me in that department.
Where were they when I was a step-mum???
I am grateful that the two women who agreed to a life with the fathers of my children have such a desire to be in my children’s lives. They not only show as much commitment to their husbands but respect for my position in my kidlets’ lives.
Neither of these women has attempted to run me out of my parental role or make my life difficult by brain washing or flipping the children against me. I have heard horror stories and honestly, I am glad I don’t have to worry about power struggling with someone who doesn’t want power – just to be included.
The step-mums in my life know how I feel, hopefully. They know I slip up and talk out of bounds and they both know they have permission to remind me of that.