Australia’s Next Top Model returned to our screens last night, and EUGH I have missed this show so much.
Yes, it’s depressing AF that the upper age limit to audition is 23, meaning that I will never be able to achieve my dream of being a really short, funny-looking-but-not-in-a-good-way model with a non-ideal body type.
But I don’t let that get to me.
Because, you guys, this show isn’t just about being young and really, really, incredibly good looking – it’s about personality and being brave and staying true to yourself. It’s all about speaking your mind.
That’s why Pauline Hanson won the first season. Obviously.
This first episode had so many great moments that we’ve decided to put them all in the one place, just for you.
So even if you didn’t have the pleasure of watching it, you can feel like you were really there.
1. A lot of yelling. And hugs.
The contestants met each other in a large concrete hall in front of a TV screen, and obviously yelled a lot because this is all very exciting.
They hugged each other, while clearly thinking “f**k you, you’re so pretty,” to an even greater extent than most girls do anyway.
Kassidy, who is 19 and makes me feel short, stumpy and unaccomplished all at once, reflected, “When I saw the other girls for the first time, I was like: ‘Oh my god what have I gotten myself into?'”
Mmm yes. Stunning women on a modelling show. How very strange.
But when the judges' voices started coming out of goddamn NO WHERE the
girls women really got excited.