Dear mothers who are not single,
PLEASE STOP calling yourself a ‘single mum’. I am a single mum. No inverted commas.
Are you looking for pity because your partner is at work while you’re at home with your child/ren? You won’t get it from single mums. Do you know how many single mums would love the luxury of being at home with their children but can’t be because they carry the financial responsibilities for their family?
Please, for the love of the ever-challenged sisterhood, please stop referring to yourself as a ‘single mum’ if you aren’t. Whether it is a ‘Monday to Friday single mum’ or ‘a single mum while my partner’s away’ or whatever other luxurious version of life you enjoy, just stop.
Some single mums choose to be single. We may have left unsafe marriages, or desperately unhappy marriages. We are fighting this hard for our children to provide a safer, happier life for them.
Other single mums have been left to deal with life as a single mum because their partner has walked out, or maybe even died. Many single mums rarely get a break, if ever. There is no one to share the financial stress, or decision making. There is no one to help make decisions on care with, or share the emotional load. There is no one to get up even once to a crying baby, day or night. We are on our own.
Day in, day out. Every. Single. Day.