Uh, excuse us. The world has officially gone mad.
The internet is musing that the very-missed former US President Barack Obama sneakily revealed the gender of the world’s most anticipated celebrity twins. (You know, the ones belonging to Beyonce and Jay Z.)
You see, Obama was quoted saying, “Jay and I are also fools for our daughters, although he’s gonna have me beat once those two twins show up”, during a video speech that aired at the rapper’s induction into the Songwriters Hall of Fame on Thursday.
Look, we understand that Barack Obama is the kind of guy who would be told all sorts of top-secret information. And yes, at one point he did have access to all kinds of important codes and buttons and a swivel-y presidential chair and yada yada yada.
But the gender of Beyonce’s twins? That’s just too much power to trust an outsider with. That’s just too top-secret. We mean, it’s the cherubic offspring of Queen Bey we’re talking about here. This is way more important than transnational relations and cyber warfare.
Have Beyonce and Zoe Foster Blake set the bar too high? You be the judge.
Also, in the off chance Obama knows anything about Beyonce’s twins, would he really tell that to a room of people and press?
Obama’s way too savvy and cool to do that. C’mon, you guys. He’s not gonna Trump that one up.
So let’s be perfectly clear: OBAMA DID NOT REVEAL ANYTHING ABOUT SAID TWINS IN SAID BEYONCE’S BELLY. WE DON’T KNOW ANYTHING YET. WE ALL REALLY NEED TO CALM DOWN.
Remember Blue Ivy? The original cherubic offspring? Our guess is Obama was talking about her.
Now, if you’ll excuse us, we’re going back to refreshing Beyonce’s Instagram page.
Cut the crap.