reality tv

A glaring oversight and a celeb cameo: The Bachelorette trailer is here, and it's glorious.

The Bachelorette 2019 is coming soon. We know this because The Bachelor has reached that point in the script season when a favourite is eliminated in order to boost finale ratings (c’mon, you know you’ll hate-watch; you do it every year). We also know this because Channel 10 has released a trailer, which says… well, that it’s coming soon.

We’re excited, sure. The casting of former Googlebox star, Angie Kent, is the most refreshing thing to happen to the franchise since Osher paired Hawaiian shirts with chinos on Bachelor in Paradise.

Watch the full Bachelorette trailer below. Post continues. 

Video via Channel 10

But speaking of Osher… a warning: there’s a disappointing lack of him in this promo. By which we mean there is none. Not even earnest voice-over about true love or roses or something.

Anyway, that glaring oversight is almost made up for by the fact that Angie’s Gogglebox sidekick, Yvie Jones makes a cameo as — wait for it — her fairy godmother.

Where are they now: Yvie Jones. Image: Channel 10.

You know, because Angie's looking for her Prince Charming, etc. etc.

The not-at-all-trite metaphor begins with the scullery maid TV personality having what, in this writer's opinion, is the perfect evening. Alone, couch, a movie, a dog. But the couple pashing on the telly remind her that she would like some company. "Buddy, where's my man at?" she says, to the dog, who is presumably playing the role of the friendly mouse/bird.


Buddy looks mildly offended by the question, but before Angie notices, Yvie appears on the screen in a high-necked white getup and a tiara. Waving her wand, she promises to make her friend's "dreams come true".

Apparently your dreams can't come true in jeans and t-shirt, because they're ditched in favour of a red ballgown that seems to be approximately 57 per cent tulle and almost definitely shouldn't be worn in the Bachelorette mansion, what with the candles and all. Naked flame + synthetic netting = unnecessary stress for whomever volunteered to be the fire marshal. (Osher, it would definitely be Osher.)

An illustration: How to dress appropriately for your dreams to come true. Images: Channel 10.

Still, Angie is clearly prepared to take the risk because the makeover continues.

Yvie swaps the Bachelorette's Ugg boots (no judgement) for a pair of nude heels that put her ankle at a frankly inhuman angle, and seem entirely unnecessary given her dress is floor-length anyway.

Somewhere, a podiatrist just fainted. Image: Channel 10.

Angie then somehow manages to remain upright as she walks outside to find her red, hipster fixie parked on the footpath. That would normally be an open invitation for petty theft, but it's soon clear she lives somewhere super posh because a) the council has put fairy lights in the trees and b) there's plenty of street parking.

Fairy godmother Yvie then turns the bike into a large plastic pumpkin — you know, just in case we didn't get the whole Cinderella analogy — and then turns that into a limo, complete with uniformed driver. (At the risk of virtue signalling, a bicycle would have been a much greener option. I mean, we assumed the Bach franchise cared about the environment, because of all the candlelight and the solar-heated pool. But... alas.)

That bike is a pair of basic bolt cutters away from having a new owner. Image: Channel 10.

Angie is then driven off into the night to play real-life Tinder, leaving her friend/godmother behind. Alone. In an empty street. At night.

I guess that's the thanks you get for providing a free outfit, hair styling, makeup and manifesting an Uber Black.

We see you, Yvie. We see you.

In summary: Angie looks great in red, but is apparently too posh to ride a bike to work; 10 points for the Yvie cameo; minus five points for lack of Osher.

Bring on the lucky dudes.

To catch up on all the Bachelor Australia 2019 recaps and gossip, check out Mamamia’s recaps and visit our Bachelor hub page.

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